voiceunmuted

Unfinished Song-in-Progress: Monster

Sooooo...remember how I talked about having this deep seated belief that I am secretly a monster; that I am, deep down, a terrible, manipulative, mean-spirited person with a selfish desire to take advantage of people for my own personal gain...and I'm just really good at convincing people otherwise and pretending otherwise to myself? 😅🫣

I think, ultimately, this belief is rooted in...

First Recordings: Picture Perfect pt.1 (Verse)

Most often these days, I only share one of the first recordings for each song. Typically because a lot of them remained pretty similar to the final product, so I just pick the one that's the most dissimilar so we can hear the progression of ideas. But this song. My goodness. I think I just had so many things I wanted to say, so much pent up frustration with the situation that led me to writing ...

Food Vibes: A Delicate Constituion

I'll be honest, I did not have a plan for this post when I put it in the schedule, but thank you so much to my body for deciding to contract COVID specifically so I would have something to talk about today...

Ps. I have added to this Taylor Swift rewrite and I think I'm funny, so...something to look forward to in a future stream maybe 😅

In case you hadn't heard, I am qui...

Health Updates: Working Overtime (WORKOUT! 🎸)

I know it isn't time for this yet, but I have so much to share in the few days since the last update 😅 BUT IT'S A GOOD THING (kind of)!

Last week I already mentioned that the Botox is working overtime. But I need to tell just HOW much overtime it is working. Because I'm extremely impressed 👀

Last Friday evening, I started to feel my pre-seizure aura, and I knew the Botox was ...

Health Updates: What's Crackalackin! (it's me)

As you may have garnered from the title...my bones are um...all cracked up 😅 But more importantly for now: The Botox is working again!! 🥳

I know this happens every time with the Botox, but I somehow keep forgetting...and this time I think it's more pronounced than before (possibly, though, I am biased because the previous dose wasn't as effective as previous doses). And that is that...

Spotify Wrapped Blooper Reel

As you may know, for the past few years, Spotify has given creators the opportunity to upload a video for their top fans on the platform. I have never participated in this before for a couple of reasons: 1. I am unwell and honestly just rarely have the energy to be "on" for an extra recording, and 2) arguably more prohibitively, I am simply an awko taco. 😂🙈 I am so awkward! And I know tha...

Bloopers: B-Team - Marianas Trench

So I've learned that I can no longer reasonably clip these videos together on my old laptop, because the software shuts down randomly at 3-40 minute intervals because my laptop just can't handle running it...so...no more making these videos from the couch. 🥲 Did I still make this one from the couch? Absolutely I did. But instead of editing the clips together all at once, I had to individuall...

Behind-the-Song: indie pop girl pt.3/4

Here we have context for the chorus in the form of examples of what inspires some that feeling of needing to be "on" all the time. And also the bridge, where it's more of a moment of reflection of whether my methods are um...reasonable or, you know...healthy? 😅🫣

(Shhh pretend the bridge is in the photo; it's totally there, I'm sure of it)

A fair warning for the breakdown of th...

First Mixes: indie pop girl

Can you guess my feedback on this one? 👀

Just kidding, I'm going to tell you right away this time, because what I learned from last time is: I will forget to go back 😅

This sounds great, right? Crushed it in one!

But the problem was that it just felt kind of...flat. The choruses should really pick up and feel big and intense, but they don't feel much different from the v...

First Recordings: indie pop girl

The way this song ended up so similar, but so different from this first recording is absolutely wild to me 🤯

Obviously the melody is a little bit different here than how it ended up, but before I properly comment on that, I just have to say I think it's funny that in both iterations of the melody, I don't really have enough time to breathe 😂 I truly do not write my songs to be sung ...

Unfinished Song Vault: over my head

I have been worse at messaging people in the past 6 months to a year than ever before in my life. And that's not just community things, but also the people closest to me in my life.

I'm sure I've talked about it plenty, but I've just never had a lot of energy for messaging. In the past, prior to starting streaming, at any given time in my life there would be maybe 2-3 people tha...

Behind-the-Song: indie pop girl pt.2

I think when I'm writing a song, I'm not always actively thinking about the structure it should have or when certain messages should be; I just write want I want to say and hope for the best 😅

The verses for this song are really just giving context to and examples of the "performance" of being an artist. How that feeling of needing to be "on" all the time manifests and some of what in...

Health Updates: Survived Another Day!

I don't have a ton to update on today, truthfully 😅 BUT I successfully (if narrowly) avoided my allergies MANY times in the past week! 🙌 So, no big deal or anything, but I basically survived a face-to-face with death 💁‍♀️

KIDDINGGGGGG

I mean, I did successfully avoid my allergies, even when they were harder to avoid, but that's just an average Tuesday 😂

On a ...

Behind-the-Song: indie pop girl pt.1

The hashtag song! 😅 This song was 100% inspired and brought to you by a hashtag that I saw on another indie artist's instagram post...I don't usually read the hashtags, but when I do...

This song was honestly so fun to write, but I also hated it so much when I first finished it and I do not know why. I think I just didn't love the cadence of the chorus? I'm really not ...

Bloopers: Free - KPop Demon Hunters

I'm going to be so real with you, I tried really hard to cut this into a shorter, sillier, more manageable bloopers reel like the usual ones, but the program crashed THREE TIMES and after losing the hour and a half I put into that third attempt, I GAVE UP. So...this is honestly just the full section of the VOD from the stream when I recorded this. And I am very sorry about it.

It would ha...

NEW SONG: Keep Going / Can't Stop - Co-Write with Tom Thomas

My FIRST EVER co-write! It's still not quite fully set in stone, but is a song ever really fully off-the-table for edits? 💁‍♀️

(Official title TBD) Tom named the song for the overarching message he wants it to send, which I think is great, but...I personally have been calling it "Can't Stop" because it's a similar message, but also acknowledges more of my own personal feelings th...

Behind-the-Song: Vampires pt.4

I said exsanguination AND I MEANT IT (kind of 😂)

I just want to be clear first and foremost that "exsanguination's real slow" is in fact the original way I wrote that last line. And I almost took it out of the song and replaced it with just "they're gonna drain you real slow". Because both lines fit. And low-key I was so in my head that a) people would not understand it or know what it...

First Mixes: Vampires Vibe Check

SURPRISE! I lied on the calendar, and instead of getting more vampires bedroom recordings, today you get the first vibe check for vampires with vocals, and next week you might just get the first ever recording of the yet-to-be-shared NEW co-write with Tom 👀

I wish I had the foresight to have saved all of the original vibe checks and mixes for each song, so I could really show you all t...

New Song Preview: Tom Thomas Collab - Keep Going / Can't Stop

As you may have heard, while I was on my week-long break, I decided to get together with Tom Thomas to co-write a song 👀

After chatting for a while about what's been going on in each of our lives, and some things we've been wanting to write about, we decided to write about the battle with our own brains about being indie artists.

As an indie artist, you have all the jobs. You are...

Food Vibes: ✨Apple Crisp Recipe✨

This is quite possibly the easiest way to impress people with an autumnal dessert 🍂

I am starting to wonder if part of why I prefer baking to cooking is that I know a good number of super simple, but super delicious recipes... 😅 Apple crisp/crumble are such classic autumn desserts and are always such a hit at parties, thanksgiving dinners, and just for funsies to give yourself a sug...

Health Updates: What the butts 🍑

I'm an IBS girlie and I think I'm funny, what can I say? 😂

This week has honestly been such a dumpster fire for my health and I truly do not have a good explanation, but I am pretty glad I had the week off of streams 😅

My week off started with two very exciting visits: BurgerBoi and Mama HK visited from the Thursday - Saturday, and Waltermellin stopped through on his way to To...

Health Updates: A true ✨POP✨ star

Good news: I saw my physiotherapist about my hand and he has been able to help! Also news: I might have made him look/feel a little silly 😅

So as you may remember, I felt something roll in my hand while I was cutting my eggs benedict a couple weeks ago... 😅 I finally got it checked out! And the first thing I said when I got to my physiotherapist's office was: "I am here for possibly...

Behind-the-Song: Vampires pt.3

GUYS. I was genuinely so scared about putting this into a song 🙈

You may have noticed from the first two song breakdowns for this one, that while the concept of the song was always feeling drained by the type of work I do and feeling like I need to do/give more, but not being able to, etc. etc., it was never explicit. I am usually pretty intentional about my lyrics, and try to make sur...

First Recordings: Vampires Intro

I feel like I originally wrote this song for someone else to sing it 😅

Very little has changed since this first version, but I just think it's interesting how I originally imagined it to be...more jazzy, I guess? Melodically, it really hasn't changed, but it somehow feels so different now compared to this first recording!

That being said...I did write this while exhauste...

Behind-the-Song: Vampires pt.2

You asked for it! 😅

Also, I realized like...several days after saying on stream that I haven't shared the lyrics/chord sheet for this and don't know if I plan to...that I uploaded the lyrics for all the Villain EP songs to streaming services 😂 So I straight up LIED TO YOU. My bad 😬

I know I use imagery and metaphor a lot in my song writing, but I really do think this is ...

Food Vibes: Meal Planning

I know it is very much my 'tism to eat the same things over and over again, but I honestly am curious what other people do. If you're not eating the same thing all the time, how do you decide what to eat?

Do you have like...specific meals you rotate throughout the week, or do you decide each individual day? What if you don't feel like having the thing you normally have?? Do you just eat...

Health Updates: Sweater Weather 🍂

The seasons are changing and I'm falling apart about it (literally) 😅🙈

I truly do not understand how it still catches me off guard that all my symptoms are worse when the weather/seasons are changing. And yet here I am, once again surprised by my body doing the same thing it does quarterly. 😂 One day I will learn and be prepared...today is not that day.

Good news first: a...

Behind-the-Song: Vampires pt.1 The Chorus

To be completely honest, I reaaaaaaaally debated whether or not to share this one 😅🫣 And for real, after you've read it, please tell me if you want the rest, or you would rather not know 😬

I wrote this song while I was trying to return to a regular streaming schedule post-concussion. I wasn't fully recovered yet, so I wasn't able to function outside of streams, and I was only ab...

First Recordings: You Suck Bridge

Yet another peek into my various songwriting strategies 😅

I actually recorded this same first few lines of the chorus three separate times because it started out with just lyrics and melody, so I recorded that, then I added chords and recorded that, and then I recorded this one with just a continuation of the chords and an arbitrarily vocalized melody to connect it back to the ...

Unfinished Song Vault - Spoopy Vibes Maybe?

It's been a while since I shared one that's just a random melody that came to me, and since we were feeling the spoopy haunting vibes yesterday, this one felt right.

I know I've talked about this a bunch since starting this Patreon, but I like that I have a lot of examples; I so often get asked how I write my songs, but I don't ever have a clear answer. I think the best way to write a son...