SamuZai
Crywolf

Crywolf

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Crywolf posts

Christmas Gift

Happy holidays, sweet ones. I know this can be a holiday season with... complicated feelings for some of you. Hope this helps a little: full wav downloads of not to be here, not to be anywhere (to walk around the abandoned landscape alone), and let me be your womb (to lay down and feel held).

not to be here: 2025-12-27 21:34:38 +0000 UTC View Post

Shirts Are Up

Sorry they didn't post for some reason. Good to go now.

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Tour Merch Early Access

Here you go, my loves šŸ¤

FYI shirts are basically gone, and rosaries are pretty low (15 of them left).

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Tour Livestream

I heard the livestream was super low quality 😩 I'm so sorry, we were working with what we had. The wifi for the cathedral must have been slow.

HOWEVER... I did get a friend to record pretty much the entire set in Dallas, so I'll be uploading that for you guys soon 😘

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Tour Merch Overstock Early Access

We have a little bit of overstock merch from the tour -- some Rosaries, hymnals, and CDs. We're making them live tomorrow (Friday) and you guys will get early access as usual. We'll post them here at 10am PST <3

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Livestream is happening!

Okay as long as nothing goes wrong with the phone the stream should start sometime around 9:30-9:45 EST

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Acoustic Tour Livestream

Hey guys <3 just a heads up, we are trying to figure out how we might be able to livestream part of the last acoustic show tonight for all of you. We won’t be 100% sure whether we can do it until we get to the venue for load in, but just wanted to give you advance notice!

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DEMO - PHANERON

I always liked this one a lot, it was going to get reworked and used for the original version of the album that ended up becoming Widow. The guy who did the mixing for M83 was actually going to work on it before I pivoted in a completely different direction.

The production on it right now would have just been to communicate the general aesthetic palette -- I definitely would have replace...

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BTS - Wuthering Waves First Demo

If you haven't heard, I recently scored the new character theme for a game called Wuthering Waves. It was a really interesting project and I got quite a bit deeper with it than was probably needed, but it's hard for me to do anything part-way.

I thought you might find it interesting to read the first thoughts I sent to the character creator, the first demo, and the initial submission bre...

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ABBADON (Live in Chicago)

Most of the show is improvised, and each one has its own vibe, so the darker stuff like this doesn't always come up, but when it does, I'm always surprised by ABBADON. It translates to an acoustic performance so unexpectedly well.

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Angels (Live in Chicago)

This is one of my favorites to perform with Emalyn.

Sorry for the shaky video - the videographer was dealing with some lens issues.

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UPDATE Sept 30th, 2025

I have been a terrible Patreoner lately. (Patreonite? Patreonarian? Patreonarch?) And I apologize, but if it makes it any better, it's been because some really cool stuff is happening. I promise I'll make it up to you guys!

Here's a quick update on everything that's been happening, and I'll be posting a ton of stuff from tour over the next week to catch up on stuff after my absence <3<...

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LIVE - Weight (Skeletons Livestream, June 2020)

Found this video while prepping for the upcoming acoustic tour, performing Weight for the Skeletons covid livestream. I love this song so much and particularly like this performance of it.

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POV your highschool hires me to play your prom and I spike the punch with robitussin (actual footage)

In honor of the release of DRIP [hushed], here is an old draft I recently found in my capcut history, of a video I started years ago and forgot about for another alternate DRIP version: the Apocalyptic Prom Night reimagining.

I can't tell exactly what the plan was supposed to be, but from the title I'm sure it was going to descend into unnerving chaos. I was able to find the concept I had...

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Anachronism [hushed] [string version]

Here's a Patreon exclusive for you guys, the recent version of Anachronism hushed but... hushed even more. Vocals, guitar and strings only, for even more calm moments.

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DEMO - GHOSTBOX (Original Song-a-day)

Originally made during the Exuvium writing period, Dan (AWAY) heard this scratch track during one of our hangouts and asked me to send it to him. When he sent me back his initial work I knew we needed to release it as a collab.

The initial drop was a bit iffy to me, but thankfully Dan doesn't seem to get psyched out about anything. I love working with him because he's one of the few peop...

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DEMO - Nothing [a heart made sweet with hunger and thirst]

Posting a bunch of demos right now because unfortunately EVERYTHING I'm working on besides the tour is under heavy NDAs at the moment. Very, very excited for them to come out though, so I can tell you all about them -- the last few months have been a whirlwind. "When it rains, it pours" is true in negative situations, but also with positive ones, and this has just been an onslaught of exciting ...

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DEMO - Centrifuge (Nothing Ever Mattered)

Centrifuge was another of the demos for the original 2nd album, before the project files were stolen and widow emerged from the void they left behind. It's interesting to imagine a parallel reality where I made the album with all of that original material, all of it much more along the lines of Skeletons -- Electric guitar focused, saudade-core lyricism, heavier electronic percussion, themes of...

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**LIVE NOW** NORTH AMERICAN TOUR EARLY ACCESS

You can get merch and tickets all in one page now 🤘

Atlanta - https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1380189216099?aff=oddtdtcreator

Jacksonville - https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1380189807869?aff...

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BTS - Group Vocal Recording (Windswept)

As you know, I love some nice big, messy group vocals. Here's a quick little walkthrough of how I go about recording them/the theory behind it. It's a bit piecemeal but thought it might be insightful for some of you 🤘

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BTS - SOMNIOMANCER Writing

Once a track is done and out in the world, it’s always surreal for me look back at the very first spark.

As soon as I read through the Arknights narrative, the ā€œwhy have your forsaken usā€ line played in my head and I ran to the piano and made this voice memo. Thought you might like to hear it for a bit of insight into my brain while I'm writing a melody/lyrics.

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ARKNIGHTS OST

First of all, welcome to all the new members! Lovely to have you guys here.

As many of you have seen, the boss battle/theme music I made for the new Arknights OST is out now on (almost?) all platforms. I've been working on it off and on over the last few months and have been itching for you all to hear it (it was one of the things I mentioned I was under an NDA for in my update video). View Post

Instagram Close Friends

Reminder that I post BTS stuff to my close friends story all the time, and if you are a Slaughterwolf or higher you get access to it. If you aren't added yet comment or shoot us a message with your handle and we'll put you on there šŸ–¤

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BTS - SPEYSIDE (Bon Iver Cover)

Full version of the clip I posted to my instagram story.

Moved to Portland recently and haven't shipped a lot of my stuff over so I've been stuck without an instrument for a few weeks. I just rooted through the closet today and discovered a ukulele. I've never played one before (not a fan of singing with high tinny instruments) but it only has four strings and it sounds like it's tuned so...

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LIVE VERSIONS - Samson (Regina Spektor cover)

There’s something nestled in this song that always splits me open. ā€œYou are my sweetest downfall. I loved you first.ā€

Growing up submerged in the language of scripture, the tale of Samson has long echoed through the hallways of my mind. Samson, granted divine strength on the condition of never cutting his hair, finds himself ensnared by love for Delilah, a woman from his ...

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DEMO - Trichinosis

There’s a traditional instrument in Bali called a Rindik, a bamboo xylophone with a dry, percussive tone. When Roniit and I were living there we bought one and I set up some mics, to make a sampler out of it.

I wrote this piece with it during the EXUVIUM writing period. I feel like it brought a sort of primal weight to the rest of the album — ritualistic, almost. It was on there as a...

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BTS - Overall Update (Pt. II)

Here's the second half of the overall update on what I'm working on right now.

šŸ–¤

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BTS - Overall Update (Pt. I)

Not in the most eloquent or talkative space right now with everything that has happened, but I wanted to give you guys a little update. Splitting it into two parts because I ramble a bit.

šŸ–¤

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DEMO - FALLOUT

Recorded on my MacBook’s built-in mic while crashing at a friend’s place on a break from LA, this one gives some interesting insight into my priorities when writing. For me, tracks never begin with nailing down the production. My initial writing doesn't even fully prioritize the final lyricism sometimes—just... the soul of them. Capturing the right emotional tone, melodies, and narrative ...

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LIVE VERSIONS - Quixote

Some songs resist being stripped down, refusing to exist the same way without the scaffolding of their production, and Quixote is one of them. I’ve only ever played it by request, unsure if it could stand on its own—but when I do, it always surprises me. Without the layers, the song shifts, the emotions land differently, and I find myself feeling the lyrics like they belong to...

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