asmrmads

livestream

Added 2025-04-30 03:23:45 +0000 UTC

Dear sweet friends and community members, I want to start by saying how truly sorry I am for not being able to show up for the live streams this month as I had hoped. You all feel like friends and family to me, and it means so much to have your trust and support.

I’ve been deep in the book club and TV show club, and I was deeply looking forward to connecting with you in real time. But something unexpected and very difficult happened. Yesterday, while out on a walk, I was grabbed by a man. Thankfully, I’m physically safe and was able to file a police report, but the experience brought up a lot of trauma from my past. My flashbacks are really strong right now. Since then, my nervous system has been in a state of deep distress — I’ve been shaking and struggling to regulate.

With everything else going on — including serious health challenges and ongoing fluid on my brain — this moment has become more than I can carry on my own. I’m doing everything I can to take care of myself, and I hope to reschedule the livestream for sometime within the first week of next month.

If you feel disappointed or disappointed in me, I understand. Your feelings are valid.

If you would prefer a refund for this month, I completely understand. Just send me a message saying “refund please” and I’ll take care of it, no questions asked.

Please know that it hurts me to let anyone down. I wish things had been different. Right now, I’m just trying to move gently through this, letting myself feel and heal without rushing.

I love this community more than I can say. You’ve made me feel seen, supported, and connected, and I hold that so close. Thank you for being here — truly. I’m doing my best, and I’ll be back soon. You've all become like friends and family which whom I deeply love and care for. Im sorry I can't show up for what I hoped to. There have been many tears and much sadness for me.

I hope you are being gentle with yourself.

With all my love,

Maddie xo