M112- A Feast from the Multiverse

Svartalfheim was less inviting—dark, cramped, and dripping with malice. They didn’t linger, Loki warning them that the Dark Elves wouldn’t appreciate unannounced visitors. Diego grumbled about how it felt like walking through a goth kid’s fever dream, and Sofia nearly set fire to a twisted root just to see if it would scream.

Nidavellir was a welcome change—hot, loud, and filled with the sound of hammer on steel. Donald greeted the Dwarves like old drinking buddies, and Anthony spent way too long testing out axes. Sofia and Diego picked through gadgets with a kind of greedy enthusiasm, while Loki made a point of scoffing at their interest. Diego ended up leaving with a pair of wicked-looking bracers, and Anthony finally picked up a curved dagger that he wouldn't shut up about. Sofia got her hands on a crossbow that was supposedly enchanted to never jam—she promptly made plans to test that claim.

Alfheim was bright and floral, too peaceful for any of them to really relax. Diego immediately started flirting with a tall, disinterested elf who looked one step away from calling the guards. Loki vanished into the crowd with a smirk, and Sofia nearly triggered a magical trap by trying to pry a glowing stone out of a fountain. They bailed before anyone could complain.

By the time they finally returned to Asgard, they looked like they’d been through hell. Diego’s clothes were ripped, Sofia’s new crossbow had been modified beyond recognition, and Anthony’s new dagger had a chunk missing. Maria’s satchel was stuffed with small trinkets from every realm, and Nigel wore a long scarf from Alfheim that he refused to explain.

The Asgardian guards took one look at their torn clothes, bruises, and ridiculous souvenirs... then wisely decided to ask no questions. Odin glanced up from his seat, giving Donald a once-over.

“You look like you’ve been dragged through every corner of the cosmos,” Odin said flatly.

Donald just shrugged. “Pretty much.”

Frigga smiled faintly. “It seems you enjoyed yourselves.”

Diego grinned, flopping into a chair. “Almost died like three times. Great vacation.”

Anthony scoffed, setting his dagger on the table. “More like twice. You’re exaggerating.”

Loki just chuckled dryly. “If he remembers anything correctly, I’ll be genuinely shocked.”

Sofia snorted. “You’re one to talk.”

Donald ignored them, grabbing a drink from a passing servant. “We’re back. No one died. That’s good enough.”

Odin just nodded, looking between them with that typical unimpressed expression. “Perhaps next time you’ll inform me before vanishing across realms. Or at least send a postcard.”

Donald didn’t look remotely sorry. “Maybe.”

Nero just sat down, stretching out with Maria already leaning against him. “Next time, we’ll take more souvenirs.”

Frigga chuckled, already used to their chaos. “I look forward to it.”

Diego leaned back with a grin. “And next time, we’re doing Muspelheim again. Nothing like a lava bath to round out our tour.”

Anthony rolled his eyes. “You just want an excuse to get half-naked in front of fire giants.”

Diego didn’t deny it, and the group settled into the hall, sharing stories of their less-than-glamorous multi-realm escapade while Loki tried—and failed—to pretend he wasn’t amused by the whole thing.

When the gang bid goodbye to Odin, Frigga, Sif, and Loki, they returned to the base, still dragging the weariness of realm-hopping behind them. As they started to scatter around the common room, Nero casually called Nigel.

“Hey, come with me for a sec,” he said, already heading toward one of the side rooms.

Nigel didn’t argue, just followed with his usual calm pace. Once the door closed behind them, Nero turned, leaning back against the table with a smirk.

“So,” Nero began, tapping his fingers lightly against the wood. “Aelsa Featherwine of the Fae, huh?”

Nigel barely blinked, his hands adjusting the charcoal scarf draped around his neck. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Right.” Nero gestured to the scarf. “The Queen of Light Elves just hands out enchanted silk to any random visitors? Must’ve missed that tradition while we were getting Diego out of that fountain he was harassing.”

Nigel gave him a flat look. “I’m fairly certain he was harassing the prince, not the fountain.”

Nero waved it off. “Either way, you didn’t exactly rush to correct her when she was draping that thing around your shoulders. Something I should know?”

Nigel escaped his gaze. “I am too old for this shit.”

Nero chuckled. “I know you too well, old man. And I also know this universe better than—oops, almost said the name. That would alert the being. Anyway, good for you. You’re melting hearts of elven queens. That’s worthy of celebration.”

Nigel shot him a look. “It was nothing like that. She’s just… courteous.”

“Oh yeah? So when she called you ‘the most captivating spirit to walk under Alfheim’s light’—that was just good customer service?”

“That was poetic flattery,” Nigel deadpanned. “She says that to all visitors.”

Nero smirked. “Pretty sure she didn’t offer anyone else a personal tour of her garden.”

Nigel rubbed his temple. “Her Highness was being polite.”

“She was trying to get into your pants.”

Nigel gave him an unimpressed look. “Are we done?”

“Nope. You gonna write her a letter? Maybe bring her flowers next time?”

Nigel folded his arms. “I’m not sending a love letter to a queen.”

Nero leaned back against the table. “Who said love? Maybe just a little ‘thinking of you’ gift. Elves are big on that sentimental shit, you know.”

A long silence stretched out before Nigel spoke again. “What would you even send an elven queen?”

Nero pretended to think. “Maybe a little jar of dried lavender from Vanaheim, tied up with a ribbon. She’d probably make some potion out of it and think it’s romantic.”

Nigel narrowed his eyes. “That’s absurd.”

“But you’re considering it,” Nero pointed out.

“Absolutely not.”

“Uh-huh. I’ll see what I can find.”

Nigel shot him a look that would have withered most people. “You’re enjoying this.”

“Like you wouldn’t believe.”

Before Nigel could fire back, Diego barged in without knocking, holding up a piece of bread with some kind of weird fruit jam smeared on it. “Hey, anyone else tried this stuff from the Asgardian feast? Tastes like fermented ass.”

Nigel looked at him. “You love ass.”

Diego almost dropped the bread. “Old people and homosexuality. Even the most open-minded are... this.” He motioned vaguely at Nigel like he was some rare specimen.

Nero raised an eyebrow. “You’re just mad because he’s right.”

Diego pointed at him with the bread. “Oh, don’t you start too. I can handle one old man calling me out, but two? That’s just bullying.”

Nigel straightened his scarf, ignoring him. “It’s not my fault you’re so transparent.”

Diego huffed and took a bite of the bread, grimacing immediately. “Ugh. Still tastes like fermented dirt. Asgardians have shit taste.”

Nero shrugged. “They like fermented fish. You thought their jam was gonna be normal?”

Diego stuck his tongue out, trying to scrape off the taste. “They could’ve warned me it tasted like someone left fruit to die in a swamp.”

Anthony walked in, holding a bottle of Asgardian liquor. “You complaining again?”

“About that jam,” Nero replied.

Anthony raised an eyebrow. “Oh, that stuff? Yeah, I made the mistake of trying it too. Tastes like moldy feet.”

Diego pointed at him. “See! It’s not just me. I was right.”

Anthony smirked. “Don’t get used to it.”

Diego flipped him off, but it lacked any real heat. He dropped into a chair, still trying to get rid of the taste. “I need something strong to burn this out of my mouth.”

Anthony tossed him the bottle. “Try not to die.”

Diego sniffed it, grimaced, then took a swig anyway. “Shit. That’s fire.”

Nero glanced at the label. “That’s literally fire wine.”

Diego coughed, wiping his mouth. “Yeah, well, it’s working.”

Nero wished he had a bag of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans just to see Diego’s reaction to eating vomit-flavored candy. That thought alone was entertaining enough to make him consider it.

Sorella decided to chime in.

[Big Brother. You can summon non-combat items anytime you wish. It will require a few points only.]

Nero raised an eyebrow. “What are points?”

[Ranking system can be divided into separate points. For example, an F-Rank Item Card is 50 points. You can break it into points and use them for small items from a universe you summoned a character from. Since you already summoned Snape, you can always summon non-combat items from the Harry Potter universe.]

Nero considered it for a second, then shrugged. He had plenty of F-Rank Item Cards lying around anyway. “Alright. Break one down and get me a bag.”

[Processing... Done.]

A small, brightly colored bag appeared in his hand, the label cheerfully proclaiming Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. Nero tossed it up and caught it with a grin, already picturing Diego’s reaction.

He walked back into the room where Diego was still nursing the fire wine with a dramatic grimace. “Hey, Diego,” Nero called. “Try these.”

Diego looked up, suspicious as always. “What is it?”

Nero raised an eyebrow. “Candy. From a friend of mine.”

Diego perked up. “Candy? You’re giving me candy? Did you poison it?”

“If I wanted to kill you, it wouldn’t be with candy,” Nero replied, tossing the bag to him.

Diego caught it, giving it a once-over. “Bertie Bott’s? Sounds fancy. You sure it’s not British garbage?”

“Try it and find out,” Nero said, already leaning against the wall to watch.

Diego popped a few into his mouth, chewed... and froze. His expression went from intrigued to horrified faster than Nero expected.

“What the actual fuck is this?!” Diego shouted, spitting the jelly beans out into a napkin.

Anthony, who had just walked in, raised an eyebrow. “What happened?”

Diego pointed accusingly at Nero. “He’s trying to kill me with fucking vomit-flavored candy!”

Anthony burst out laughing. “What the hell did you give him?”

Nero tossed him the bag. “Try your luck.”

Anthony squinted at the bag, then shrugged and popped one in his mouth. His eyebrows shot up immediately. "Sushi? Interesting but not bad."

Diego, still in shock, looked at him like he’d just spoken in tongues. "Sushi?"

Anthony nodded, chewing thoughtfully. "Yeah. Actually tastes pretty decent."

Diego snatched the bag from his hand. "No way. Maybe that jam cursed my tongue." He eyed the beans suspiciously before picking one and tossing it in his mouth.

His expression went from hopeful to absolutely disgusted in a heartbeat. "Earwax. What the actual fuck, Nero?"

Nero just raised an eyebrow. "It’s random. You got unlucky."

Maria wandered over, curious, and reached for the bag. "What’s going on?"

Diego made a gagging motion. "Nero’s trying to assassinate me with whatever British monstrosity that is."

Maria picked a bright red one and ate it without a second thought. She hummed, eyebrows raising. "Cinnamon. Not bad."

Sofia snatched the bag before Diego could protest, picking out a green one and popping it in. She blinked a few times, looking vaguely impressed. "Mint chocolate."

Diego stared at her, betrayed. "How? Why am I getting all the nasty ones?"

Nigel, who followed Nero to the room, looked at Diego’s despair and then at the bag. Without asking, he took one and ate it calmly. "Honey."

Diego threw his hands up. "You’re fucking with me."

Nigel didn’t even look at him. "Perhaps your karma’s catching up."

Donald strolled in, clearly curious after hearing all the commotion. "What’s going on?"

Nero held up the bag. "Magical candy. Random flavors."

Donald raised an eyebrow and picked one out, inspecting it before shrugging and eating it. He chewed slowly, giving a small nod. "Blueberry."

Diego looked like he was one more bean away from a breakdown. "There’s gotta be a trick to it. I’m not that unlucky."

Anthony snorted. "It’s not the candy’s fault."

Diego pointed at him. "Shut up. I’m trying again."

He fished around in the bag with exaggerated focus, finally picking a bright yellow one. He popped it into his mouth—and immediately looked like he was going to throw up.

"Soap. Oh my god, why."

Nero shrugged. "Maybe the universe is trying to tell you to wash your mouth with soap."

Diego gave him a death glare, and Nero raised his hand. "Alright, alright. Try this one." He summoned a small tin and tossed it over.

Diego caught it midair, reading the label. "Devil Fruit-Flavored Candy? What the hell is this supposed to taste like?"

"No clue," Nero replied. "But it can’t be worse than soap."

Diego hesitated before popping one into his mouth. His eyes widened immediately, and he made a noise halfway between a gag and a groan, clutching his throat like he’d just downed poison.

“Oh god—what the fuck—” He stumbled over to the sink, desperately washing his mouth out.

Anthony leaned against the counter, eyebrows raised. “That bad?”

Diego turned, looking like he’d been personally betrayed. “It tasted like rotting garbage and ass had a baby and then died.”

“Yeah.” Nero grinned. “Supposed to taste like the worst thing you can imagine. People hate them.”

Diego glared. “Why do you have this?”

“Because it’s funny.” Nero didn’t even try to hide his amusement.

Nero couldn’t help but laugh as Diego kept gargling water at the sink, still trying to wash out the taste of the Devil Fruit-flavored candy.

Anthony grabbed the tin from the counter, eyeing it suspiciously. “What the hell did you give him?”

Nero waved his hand dismissively. “Just something special for Diego. It’s fine.”

Donald leaned against the doorframe, smirking. “Is he dying?”

Diego finally pulled away from the sink, wiping his mouth. “I wish. That would be less painful. That shit tastes like a dead rat soaked in sewage. With some extra mold on the side.”

Nero snorted. “You’re being dramatic. It’s not that bad.”

“It is,” Diego snapped back. “It really is.”

Nigel glanced at the tin, shook his head, and picked up the bag of Bertie Bott’s again. “I’m inclined to believe him this time. Whatever you did, it’s particularly heinous.”

Nero just shrugged, already moving toward the counter. Nero tossed the cursed candy back into his inventory and waved his hand. “Alright, I’ll make it up to you. I’ve got the good stuff.”

Diego, still trying to scrub the taste off his tongue, glanced over warily. “If it’s another murder snack, I’m breaking into your room and throwing your shoes into the ocean.”

Nero ignored him, focusing on the summoning. “Sorella, get me the good stuff. Make it fancy.”

[Got it, Big Brother.]

A flicker of light, and the table filled up with an array of dishes and drinks. Nero picked out a few things first, setting them down with exaggerated care.

“Okay, first off—something that won’t kill you.” Nero placed a steaming bowl down. “Sky Island Pumpkin Soup.”

Anthony perked up, sniffing the air. “That smells... way better than anything I expected.”

Diego squinted at it. “If this is another ‘rotting fruit’ moment, I swear I’m burning your pillow.”

Nero deadpanned. “It’s soup, Diego. Just eat it.”

Diego cautiously scooped up a spoonful, hesitated, and then finally tasted it. His eyes widened immediately. “Holy shit.”

Sofia raised an eyebrow. “That good?”

“It tastes like comfort and happiness,” Diego said, practically inhaling the rest of it.

Donald, leaning back on the couch, glanced over. “You sound like you’re about to propose to the soup.”

Diego pointed his spoon at him. “You wouldn’t get it. You’re too emotionally constipated.”

Nero ignored them, moving on. “Next up—Ichiraku Ramen. Because we’re not half-assing this meal.”

Anthony was already reaching for a bowl before Nero finished speaking. “Now we’re talking.”

Sofia picked one up too, blowing on the broth. “Smells legit.”

Nero gestured to the drinks. “Butterbeer, if you’re feeling nostalgic. Chocolate Frogs and Hagrid’s Rock Cakes for Diego.”

Diego looked up from his soup, frowning. “What the hell’s a Rock Cake?”

Nero handed him one without a word. Diego bit into it—and immediately winced. “Why is it like biting into a brick?”

Nigel smirked. “It’s in the name, genius.”

Sofia popped a Chocolate Frog into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. “Weirdly good.”

Donald picked up a Butterbeer, inspecting the foamy top. “This better not be another prank.”

Nero snorted. “It’s not. Just drink it.”

Donald took a sip, his eyes widening slightly. “That’s... actually really good.”

Diego, halfway through demolishing his second bowl of ramen, barely looked up. “You’re welcome.”

Nero shook his head. “You didn’t make it.”

Diego shot him a look. “Yeah, but I hyped you up enough that you did it. I’m basically the inspiration.”

Anthony shot him a dry look. “You’re just a loud pain in the ass.”

Diego grinned. “And you love me for it.”

Ignoring the chaos, Nero summoned a few more things. “Cabbage Stew from Avatar. Air Nomad Fruit Pies. Spiced Tea. Gasoline Smoothies and Rust-eze Energy Drink for Nyx.”

Sofia raised an eyebrow. “Gasoline Smoothies? Are we planning on killing someone?”

As if on cue, the garage door opened, and Nyx rolled in. The sleek black Aston Martin DB5 gleamed under the lights, and her headlights blinked twice as she approached.

"Little Brother. You called?"

Nero grinned. “Got you something.” He set the Gasoline Smoothie on the ground, and the car leaned forward, the hood shifting down as if sniffing it before an engine purr of satisfaction echoed through the room.

"You spoil me, Little Brother."

He too sat and started to eat Ramen with some butterbeer. Ichiraku Ramen deserved every praise Naruto showered it with. This stuff was amazing. Maria next to him was already eating her fourth bowl, like she planned to devour the entire pot by herself.

Nero wiped his mouth and decided to summon something even more iconic. With a thought, a tray of Krabby Patties appeared on the table, the unmistakable aroma spreading through the room.

Anthony glanced over, curious. “What the hell’s that?”

Nero picked one up, taking a bite. “Krabby Patty. From SpongeBob-Verse.”

Diego perked up immediately. “Oh, hell no, you’re not keeping this to yourself. Gimme that!” He practically pounced on the tray, grabbing one and taking a big bite. His eyes widened. “Holy shit! I get why they fight over these. This is the best burger I’ve ever had.”

Sofia raised an eyebrow, wiping some soup off her chin. “A burger from a cartoon is the best you’ve ever had? You’re hopeless.”

Diego just waved her off, too busy cramming the burger into his mouth to care. “Call me hopeless all you want, but this is life-changing.”

Donald reached over and grabbed one, giving it a skeptical once-over before taking a bite. He paused, his face shifting from confusion to reluctant appreciation. “...Okay. That’s actually pretty good.”

Anthony picked one up too, biting into it slowly. “Not bad. Definitely better than that garbage sandwich from Vanaheim.”

Sofia smirked. “That’s not saying much. Anything would be better than that pile of mold.”

Diego wiped his mouth, grabbing another patty. “Vanaheim food was straight-up offensive. I don’t care if it’s magical or whatever, it tasted like a compost bin.”

Nigel, casually sipping his Butterbeer, gave Diego a sidelong look. “Perhaps next time, you should refrain from eating food labeled ‘Fermented War Meat.’”

Diego scoffed. “It looked like beef jerky, how was I supposed to know? The label was in runes!”

Anthony chuckled. “You ate it without even asking what it was. You’re lucky it didn’t kill you.”

Nero tossed another Krabby Patty at Diego, who caught it mid-air with a grin. “Diego’s stomach would survive the apocalypse.”

Donald shook his head. “If cockroaches ever go extinct, we’ll know Diego’s still out there, eating anything that moves.”

Sofia grabbed a Krabby Patty and took a tentative bite, her eyebrows shooting up. “Oh, wow. This is way better than it has any right to be.”

Maria smirked at her. “Told you. Don’t knock the cartoon food.”

Sofia rolled her eyes. “Still weird.”

Anthony pointed at the tray. “Gimme another. Can’t let Diego hog the whole thing.”

Diego threw up his hands dramatically. “I’m a victim here. I’m being oppressed.”

Nero looked unimpressed. “If anyone’s oppressed, it’s the burger. You’re murdering it.”

Diego snorted. “Can’t murder something that’s already dead.”

Maria set down her empty bowl and grabbed a Krabby Patty, leaning into Nero as she took a bite. “Yeah, okay, this one’s a win. You’re lucky you didn’t summon the Nasty Patty instead.”

Nero smirked. “Would’ve been fun to watch Diego’s face, though.”

Donald glanced at Nero, unimpressed. “Pretty sure he’d survive it. He’s basically immune to bad food at this point.”

Nero called the rest of the Summons to the common room, deciding that since they were already eating and drinking, they might as well make a proper night of it. Nyx revved happily at the idea of a party, and Diego raised his glass in approval.

Snape entered, his usual grim expression unchanged, but his eyes flickered over the array of food. Nero waved him over. “Don’t just stand there, Severus. Try the Butterbeer.”

Snape gave him a sidelong glance but picked up a mug without much fuss. He took a cautious sip, his brow lifting a fraction. “Acceptable.”

Spanner and Gianni showed up next, both looking a bit lost at first, but Spanner’s eyes immediately locked onto the mechanical gadgets strewn across the table from their previous adventure. He picked up the ice spear Nero had bought in Jotunheim and examined it with an approving hum.

Gianni sniffed the air and zeroed in on the ramen, his face lighting up. “This smells amazing!”

Spanner dipped a ladle into the soup, filling a bowl for himself before stepping back to make adjustments to the ice spear. “This mechanism is interesting. Who made it?”

Nero shrugged. “Some Jotun blacksmith. They’re good at weapon crafting.”

Spanner nodded, intrigued. “Could enhance it. Add a stabilizer, maybe an ice core generator.”

Nigel, listening from the couch, glanced over. “Yes, because what we really need is to turn the base into Elsa’s ice castle. Great plan.”

They stayed up late, the chaotic noise and laughter filling the base with an energy that hadn’t been there for a while. Stories were shared, mostly exaggerated and embellished by Diego, while Sofia kept trying to hack into the Ice Spear to see if it had any hidden functions.

Nyx played old songs from their respective worlds, and Donald ended up in a low-stakes arm-wrestling contest with Gianni, who surprisingly held his own for a while before losing with a loud curse.

Snape, despite himself, was drawn into a conversation with Nigel about potion-making versus alchemical processes. Spanner threw in his own theories about mixing magic with technology, and somehow they ended up discussing whether ice could be used as a magical conduit.

By the time the night bled into morning, half of them were sprawled out on the couches or leaning against each other, too tired to move but too content to bother getting up.

Nero, sitting with Maria’s head on his shoulder, glanced around the room. It was messy, loud, and more than a little chaotic. But it was theirs.

One day, he planned to call all the Summons back at once and throw an even bigger party. They deserved it. For now, this would do.