Fart Face - Ch. 4 (Final) (September 2024)

Jenny gussied up in front of the bathroom mirror. She had put on eyeliner and panicked slowly over which hairstyle looked best on her. Ponytail? Half-up-half-down? All down? She hadn’t worried about her appearance in a very long time, so this feeling felt alien to her. She technically hadn’t even gone out with anyone before, given the whole lesbian thing. The early 2000’s wasn’t so far away in the grand scheme of things but culturally it was very much unkind to queer people. College life had instead been filled with flings and one-night stands for her, and dating life after college was the doldrums.

            Every other pair of jeans she had was too tight for her bloated belly. She kept the same but this time wore a black crop top with a frilly edge. She didn’t bother with a belt and just left her jeans unbuttoned. She figured Elaine wouldn’t mind because she was a little weird. But. Maybe weird was good in this day and age.

            Jenny always traveled light so there wasn’t much to hide in her suite. She never really partied or had a visitor when she was out and about on these tournaments. She had hardly touched anything in the suite, which was large enough for a party of 20 people. The view overlooked the main street of Las Vegas, with all its dazzling lights.

            Her stomach gurgled, and it wasn’t just because of all the food she had eaten…

            I haven’t been nervous like this about seeing someone since college.

            She thought about having a smoke but she would have had to walk all around the back of the hotel, and what if Elaine hated smoker’s breath? Look at her – wondering what someone might think of her for the first time in literal years.

            Jenny was in the middle of figuring out what to have on the TV when a knock sounded at the door exactly one hour later. She jumped and dropped the remote. “Coming!”

            Figures. Of course she’s exactly on time.

            She took a long deep breath before opening the door.

            Elaine stood there, dressed exactly as she was earlier. Jenny found that uncomfortable, because it came off as Jenny being the one who needed to dress up. But she set it aside and let her in.

            “So, this is the suite, huh?” Elaine said, looking around.

            “Yeah! It’s got a bar and everything.”

            “Wooow.”

            Jenny went around to the bar and asked in a silly voice, “Something for the lady?”

            Elaine replied playfully, “A gin and tonic, ma’am.”

            Jenny smirked. Time to show off her skills. Elaine blinked twice at the sudden sight of Jenny flipping a bottle of Beefeater and crafting a gin and tonic in seconds.

            “Are you a bartender too?’

            “Was.”

            “Nice! What other tricks have you got up your sleeve?”

            Jenny was glad to be able to entertain her for a good ten minutes. They quickly got into the mood with a few cocktails in their system before they settled down on the floor at the coffee table for another poker game. A cocktail seldom bothered Jenny on a full stomach.

            Elaine wanted deal this time, especially because she wanted to practice shuffling the deck. But with the alcohol getting to her a bit, she fumbled a lot. They snickered about it and Jenny was wondering if she might be a bit cringe, but it was excusable.

            While they were in the midst of a game, Elaine said, “You know how you keep a straight face even when you’re farting?”

            “Yeah?”

            “What does your face look like when you actually fart?”

            Jenny raised a brow at the question. For one, she actually didn’t know. It wasn’t like she looked in a mirror each time she farted. She just did it. But she never once actually thought about the fact that when she was alone, all to herself in her hotel room or back home, she would let everything rip.

            “I don’t actually know. I don’t think I make a face when farting.”

            “Really? But even if it’s like…I dunno…really big or relieving or something?”

            Despite the growing stupor from the alcohol, Jenny was still sober enough to suspect something. “This is a weird conversation…”

            Elaine withdrew immediately. “Sorry. Never mind.”

            After Elaine dealt the River, Jenny went back to it. She figured the best way to handle this was to face it head-on. “Is this something you’re into?”

            Elaine dropped her cards facedown and looked at her with a terrified expression. “Um. What?”

            “Come on. You’re not exactly subtle. Neither in the game nor outside of the game.”

            “No, I’m…just…you know. Asking because it’s what you’re known for….”

            “Come on. I know by now you’re not TMZ or anyone trying to pry into my secrets. You’re too timid and shy for that. No offense. I get you, girl. Because the first time I saw you I thought you were hot as fuck.”

            Elaine shied away with a nervous chuckle. She drew back strands of hair behind her ear. “Um. Heh. Thank you.”

            As it had been well after an hour since Jenny ate, her stomach was now digesting all those literal pounds of food. She knew the feeling all too well – when her stomach was not quite sluggish but full of fermenting, bubbling gas that would eventually need to come out.

            In fact, she had one ready to come out right then and there. She leaned to one side a bit to make the fart easier to come out.

        PPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPP!

            The deep bassy explosion rumbled against the floor.

            Elaine was flabbergasted, absolutely floored at hearing her favorite celebrity fart in front of her. She didn’t know what to say, but eventually said, “W-wow, I actually felt that from here, ahaha!”

            “What face did I make?”

            “I could tell you held your breath in before you farted. Kind of like this…holding your mouth slightly open look. Does that make sense?”

            “I suppose sometimes I grunt when I fart. But that wasn’t big enough for me to do.”

            Elaine’s eyes widened. “You can fart louder than that?”

            “Hell yeah.” Jenny scoffed. “You have NO idea how well I’m able to control them during a game. If I were allowed to just let them all go, nobody would be able to focus on the game.”

            Elaine was so smitten and shy that she couldn’t know what to say except chuckle nervously as she blushed. “Wow. I mean. Ahem. Wow.”

            “So? Let’s continue playing and see what other faces I make.”

            Despite such a loud fart, Jenny had a lot more in her. She knew that they would keep on coming through the night well into the morning. Elaine enjoyed the sudden surprise of her farts during the silences in the rounds. They would be staring at their cards until Jenny broke the silene with a tremendous sonorous bassy explosion.

            Elaine laughed. “I can’t believe you can be so expressionless after farting so loud!”

            “Like I said. It has to be REALLY big for me to feel affected by it.”

            Elaine clutched the cards tighter. She said, “Well…maybe you can do something that could maybe…add to it? I dunno.”

            “Hmmm. It’s not like I can control it or anything like that. But…I guess I could have a couple beers or something.”

            Jenny huffed as she got up. Elaine mentioned how she liked seeing her struggle to get around with her bloated gut, and how visible it was. Jenny patted it with a sense of pride and said, “I was able to out outdrink and outeat anyone back in college. I still think I can now.”

            She started to regret having that extra beer though halfway through it. She kept it to herself and kept a straight face as they played more poker. But deep down her stomach was now bursting for real and even though her jeans were unbuttoned and completely unzipped, the relief wasn’t enough. That last beer was like a straw that broke the camel’s back, and she was feeling the weight like a bowling ball.

            But out of some pride, she still retained her composure.

            “Feeling anything yet?” Elaine asked.

            Jenny thought her lips might have wavered. “No.”

            Elaine eyed her up and down, then said with a smirk. “You sure?”

            “I know myself. I’m good.”

            Fucking hell, what happened? I feel worse than that one time in college…aw man.

            The unthinkable happened – Jenny lost. She had been so caught up in her struggle to keep herself composed that she hadn’t been focusing on the game. Elaine beat her with a three-of-a-kind against her two pair. The Showdown left her staring at their hands with a completely blank expression.

            Elaine giggled. “Are you sure you’re okay? You didn’t LET me beat you, did you?”

            Jenny got a little annoyed. “Beginner’s luck. Nothing more.”

            It was Jenny’s turn to deal, and as she was dealing the cards, she stopped briefly as her stomach gurgled so loudly that both of them heard it.

            Elaine pursed her lips and didn’t say anything, looking at her cards.

            Halfway through dealing the Flop, Jenny felt an actual gas bubble causing her pain. It was right there waiting. Her sphincter was ready to blow a gasket. This was unlike any other fart because the sensation could have been mistaken for needing to take a shit.

            “Jenny?”

            Jenny looked up. She had been caught in a daze, a little sweaty. It was her turn to either call Elaine’s bet or fold. She decided to call and keep going.

            They went through the Turn and the River, when right before deciding the final bet, Jenny couldn’t take it anymore. Her body literally couldn’t take it anymore. No amount of ab workouts could have held this monster.

            In the midst of deciding what to bet, while staring at her cards, Jenny let go of the biggest fart of her life.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

            She felt life escape her in the ten or so seconds that the fart dragged on, like an out-of-body experience. She fully realized a certain mystery to farting that she hadn’t before – the pleasure of relief that implied intense discomfort, kind of like shitting. The fart really felt like it was purifying her of some toxic air inside. The fact that it dragged on so long was impressive as it was grotesque. For the very first time, she truly felt the mixture of both. The fart fucking stank too as it came out of her.

            And then when it was done (maybe fifteen seconds?) Jenny let out an audible grunt, sighed, and collapsed on the floor.

            Elaine cried, “Oh my GOD! That was INCREDIBLE!”

            Jenny laid flat on her back and sighed, rubbing her belly.

            “Aw man…I can’t believe I heard what just came out of me. Jesus Christ.”

            Elaine crawled over to her so that she was looking down at her. She smirked. “So. Call? Fold?”

            Jenny drew Elaine’s face closer for a kiss.

            “Fold.”