Argent + LMP (Hi-Res)

Double upload! Argent (RegalRegex of Twitter, snake portrait) and LMP_Dragon (Twitter, dragon commander).

I plinked at Argent over the past few months, practicing a few things and trying a few brushes some more. LMP was a commission over the past week and a half-ish. Both were very fun! Argent's such a wonderful design, I absolutely had to share some love with Regal, for sharing him with us all on Twitter and elsewhere. And LMP was also great; while he didn't have a lot of reference, we got to work together to create some sort of armor and clothing for the leader. I included the version before I added the gold patterning as a Patreon bonus. c: In case you really want to get in there and look at those abs, for example.

Next on my list is Falindrith. He gets most of my attention, and then I'm pivoting over to Sombreve's next background piece for Dawn of Corruption. I'll also be noodling at a new price sheet that I'll share here first, in case there are any takers that are interested, before dropping it in other spots...!

Thank you all, as always, for the love and support. It means the world to me. I hope these are enjoyed. Stay safe out there! Hope you're staying warm.

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Hit a bit of a snag the past week-ish. Depression swings again. :<

It's a bit of an annoyance. I haven't yet gotten to meet with a therapist again, so I'm kind of flipping back and forth between being very proud of the work I'm doing, and then wondering if anyone back home like family or my grandmother is proud of what I do. Or if they even know what I do. I called home the other day, only to break down in asking, and got at least a bit of comfort in knowing that yes, they are proud. Which has helped a little bit.

I think it's mostly just the weather, the bills, the... everything. I'm tired a lot. Not in the "I want to sleep, I am tired" way but the "I am emotionally, mentally, physically spent" way. It kind of feels like everything is still crashing around me, but I at least have a small bubble I can exist in now. We aren't, like, full on 2020 mode, but it's still unnerving to know that just outside my periphery is... Well, I don't have to go into the news or politics and all that for you to kind of know what I mean.

And I think the only way I know how to internalize and process everything is to reflect it back at myself, my value, my self-worth, my output. And it sometimes is hard to keep moving when I do that. I AM still moving, but wow, I could do without the weights on my feet.

I don't normally share outside links, but. If you want some pop-punk from one of my favorite bands, this is sort of the... general vibe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxzNE-W0We0

There's a definite vibe of "who gives a shit" just floating under the surface of my thoughts. In both a fatalistic way, but also, a "Who cares what I'm doing or why". It makes for a bit of confusion and mixed messaging when they both battle for attention. The song hits me as well because, like the singer, for a time I thought my depression was getting better and going away, that it was about not letting sadness win, as he puts it in another song. But lately, I just kind of can't help but think... Maybe it's just always there. And I kind of... Reflect that in my work, in my output?

Lots to think about, like how to navigate that, how to display it, how to work -with- it rather than against it. I have ideas. But I dunno if people want vent art or more depressive imagery from me -- I think I want to share it, but whoop, then we're back to "Would anyone care?" You probably see how this is cyclical. (Not looking for an answer, for what it's worth. I know it doesn't -truly- matter, that I should do art for me, but... I hope this puts into frame of reference how my mind runs around.)

okay this ramble has gone in a direction i didn't expect

Gonna hit post. I got more stuff to work on! And a lot of discipline I need to relearn. I hope you all are doing well, truly. I dunno how many people actually read these rambles but, if you do, thank you. Seriously. I truly appreciate the love, support, all of that. <3 I will always try to keep doing better for you, to share better work with you. Love you all.