queennyanlathotep

Rubber Roommate (Rubberization, TG, 2nd Person)

You’re at your desk, typing away at your keyboard, when you hear the creak of the door sliding open. Followed by the squelch of something sticky against the floor.

“Good afternoon, Plastine,” you say, without looking up from your work. “Did you have a good day?” 

“Aww, I was trying to surprise you!” comes a squeaky, helium-high voice. 

Sighing, y...

Poll #32 Results

The results are in, and it's a victory for The Cursed Quest (Konosuba Bathroom Objects TF) at 22 votes! Congrats to those of you who voted for it!

ROYAL REWARD: Catastrophic Crime Spree, Part 3 (Inanimate TF, Dragon Maid)

Tohru’s boobs bounced as she sauntered home from the mall, a smile on her face and a bagful of shopping swinging from each arm. Miss Kobayashi is going to be so happy to try my cooking tonight! 

The sun slipped over the horizon like a spilled yoke, and darkness slowly settled on the city. Tohru cocked her head, frowning in confusion. Had she really left it so late? ...

Story Poll #32

It's polling time again! Vote to decide what I should write for the next Patreon exclusive story!

Remember, you can pick multiple options!

SUGGESTION: Masturbatory Mia / Tearmoon Toys (Inanimate TF, Tearmoon Empire)

A high-pitched voice rang through the corridors of the palace. 

“Aaaaanne? Aaaaanne?” Mia hurried through the halls, skirts hefted to avoid tripping over them, her gaze snapping left and right, into one room after another. “Aaaanne?” Just where had that maid gotten too? 

After several minutes of searching, she reached the only room in the building she’d ye...

ROYAL REWARD: Ina's Collection: Advent (Inanimate TF, Latex, Hololive)

Placing her hands on the door, Nerissa squinted through the keyhole.

“Can you see them?” asked Shiori, leaning on her shoulders. 

“Maybe?” said Nerissa, cocking her head with a frown. “It’s hard to tell. I can see these squirming, human shapes, but… Whether that’s them…”

“Let me take a look!” cried Bijou, pushing Nerissa out of the ...

ROYAL REWARD: Manikin a Big Mistake! (Inanimate TF, Petrification)

The cover of the vent struck the shop floor with a crash. 

“Nice one, idiot!” cried a voice from the shaft. “I thought you said you wanted to do this stealthily!” 

“We are doing this stealthily!” came a second voice. “What do you want me to do? Unscrew it?” 

“You think I’d trust you to handle a screwdriver?” 

With...

ROYAL REWARD: Futanari’s Nyeat Nyew Bed (Latex, Forniphilia, Cumflation, Futanari)

Futanari’s bed squeaked as she shifted in her sleep, rolling onto her back with her cock aimed at the ceiling, a fat pole, flag white and dripping. 

Beneath her, Yukino moaned as her latex prison shifted around her, rubbing against her breasts and her crotch as her owner turned atop her. Only one part of her body remained exposed to the air, and it certainly wasn’t a part ...

Fated Furniture (Inanimate TF, Fate)

Moonlight glinted off the glass of the Emiya Household’s windows.

Falling out of the night like a great, black-winged bat, a specter settled on the rooftop of the building. Spreading its cape, it reached into its cloak and retrieved a moon-tipped staff. “You’ll pay for destroying my Territory, Saber. I’ll create a new one, right here. And what better material could I ask for…”...

ROYAL REWARD: Butt-Based Bet Timeline 1, Part 3 (Absorption, Inanimate TF, RWBY)

Ruby’s clothes rustled as she tossed them to the floor. 

“Are you sure about this, Ruby?” said Yang, one eyebrow raised in concern. “Once we do this, it’s gonna last for a while. It’s not like I can just turn you back.” 

Ruby giggled. “I’ll be fiiiiine,” she said. “Weiss seems like she’s having a great time.” 

Yang frown...

ROYAL REWARD: Spidersilk Panties, Part 1 (Inanimate TF, So I’m a Spider, So What…?)

Panchira crept through the halls of the night-dark inn, her feet raising not a sound, though her high heels produced a rather notable clack each time they struck the floorboards. Fortunately, she was under a ninja-field anyway, so she didn’t need to worry about keeping a cat-like tread.

Creeping down the hall, she opened a nearby door, poked her head through, and sniffed...

ROYAL REWARD: Elizabeth Love Pillow (Inanimate TF, Hololive)

It's the Scarlet Queen! The great leader of Justice herself! Only... she looks like she's having a little trouble, doesn't she? Not only has she been turned into a body pillow, but it's one where she's all tied up too! That's got to suck. It's, like, double bondage. Bondage². (I don't know why I drew her like this. It seemed like a good idea at the time.)

Yoga Balloons (Inflation)

Strains and grunts sounded from the room ahead. “Okay, everyone, it’s time to try the upward facing dog again. On the count of three! One… two… Aaaaad–!” Gasps of exertion. The twang of a pair of tight lycra pants splitting. “Oh dear, not again…!” 

On the other side of the door, Ichi and Ni looked on and suppressed a giggle of amusement. Hidden beneath their ninja-f...

ROYAL REWARD: A Long Way From Home (TG, Dragongirl TF, 2nd Person)

The sky thunders as you trudge along the mountain path, the soles of your feet and every muscle in your body aching as if they’re about to snap. You’ve been walking for what feels half an eternity at this point, and it’s starting to feel as if you’re never going to reach the ground again. Who knew climbing mountains was so hard?

Just as you’re about to sink into despair, ...

ROYAL REWARD: Miss Kobayashi's Big, Hard, Throbbing USB Stick (Inanimate TF, Futanari, Expansion, Corruption, Dragon Maid)

Kobayashi stepped into the apartment with a frown, letting the door slam behind her. Pausing on the welcome mat, she cocked her head and listened, waiting for a sound, but it was strangely quiet. Tohru and Kanna were off in the Other World, but that should still leave… “Ilulu? Ilulu, are you here?” If she’d left without closing the door again…

Leaving her bag by the door,...

ROYAL REWARD: Catastrophic Crime Spree, Part 2 (Inanimate TF, TG, Onimai)

Mahiro screwed up his eyes and covered his crotch as he hurried to the restroom. Urgh! This is awful! How do girls handle this? And why couldn’t Mihari make me a drug that helps me hold it in? Argh! 

Throwing himself through the door, Mahiro flung himself into the nearest cubicle and pulled down his panties just in time to avoid the inevitable. As he relaxed with a ...

Fontaine’s Fall (Various Inanimate TFs, Genshin Impact)

The bell on the catgirl’s tail rang as she skipped through the Court of Fontaine, the moonlight glinting off the cardboardium tank in her paws. “La la la~, la la la~, sneaking through the city, la la la~.” Reaching the canal, she plopped the tank on the edge, popped its lid, and casually pushed it over, spilling a shining pink fluid into the calm waters below her. 

“La...

ROYAL REWARD: The Collector: Leafa and Sinon (Inanimate TF, SAO)

Leaning back in her chair, Shushuka took a deep breath and kicked hard off the wall, sending herself spiraling across the room. Bouncing from one side to the other like a ping pong ball full of semen, she slid at last to a stop with a sigh of exhaustion. “Hmm, something’s wrong, nya.” Scratching her chin in thought, she slipped a hand into her pants and, without thinking, wrapped a...

ROYAL REWARD: Nuts and Dolt’s Cosmic Condom (Inanimate TF, Giantess/Omnipotence, Futanari, RWBY)

The pair giggled as they spun, hand in hand, nose pressed against nose and breast against breast, sexes burning, through the door and into the dark of the bedroom, where the bed waited to receive them with a characteristic squeak of the springs. 

For a minute or two, they rolled back and forth and side to side on the covers, so overcome by their own lust they couldn’t even sate it ...

Poll #31 Results

The results are in, and it's a victory for Fontaine’s Fall (Various Inanimate TFs, Genshin Impact) at 26 votes! Congrats to those of you who voted for it!

ROYAL REWARD: Butt-based Bet: Timeline 2 Follow-Up (Absorption, Inanimate TF, RWBY)

A strange sound passed through the halls of Beacon, rolling down the corridors and turning heads in every dorm. It resembled, in a certain sense, a wobbling–the kind of sound produced by something large and flexible rippling in the air: Bo-woing! Bo-yoing! Bo-woing! It had an element of bounce to it. 

Accompanying this strange sound was a second, slightly more nor...

Story Poll #31

Vote to decide what I should write for the next Patreon exclusive story! You can pick multiple options!

ROYAL REWARD: Spy x Lamp (Inanimate TF, Absorption, Spy x Family)

Loid paused in the doorway and turned back to them with a smile. “Well, it was good to see you, Fiona,” he said, placing his hat on his head, “but I have to leave now or I’ll never get to work on time.”

Fiona Frost almost shattered her teacup. Not that she allowed her expression to change in the slightest. “Oh, that’s unfortunate,” she said, saucer rattling. “Well...

ROYAL REWARD: Lola Pop vs. Nitara (Inflation, ARMS, Mortal Kombat)

The roar of the crowd washed through the stands like a tsunami, threatening to drown the contestants alive. You know, like, figuratively. 

In the announcers’ booth, Ichi and Ni looked down on the scene below with grins of smug amusement. “Hello and welcome to the 2nd annual except nyot really ad hoc Lola Pop vs. somebody tournament, nya!” 

“That’s right, this is ...

ROYAL REWARD: Ina's Collection, Gen 0 (Latex, ABDL, Hololive)

Sora’s boots crashed against the stone floor of Ina’s lair as she and the rest of Hololive Gen 0 rushed through the dungeon in search of their missing comrades. “Come on! This way!” cried Sora, heart pounding. “Just a little farther! I can hear them up ahead!” 

Roboco’s feet struck the stone with harsh metallic clangs. “We’re never going to make it!” 

�...

ROYAL REWARD: Gigi Onahole

Uh oh, looks like the Chaser of Justice bit off more than she could chew when she tried to catch Seigu. At least she'll have plenty of time to reflect on her mistakes as a tight little onahole. Assuming the pleasure doesn't drive her insane.

ROYAL REWARD: Weiss's Dust Gun (Inanimate TF, Absorption, Futanari, RWBY)

Weiss Schnee slammed her textbook shut with a groan of frustration. “That’s it! I’m done! I just can’t take any more of this!” 

Lying back on her bed, she closed her eyes and groaned in frustration. With classes finished, the other member of Team RWBY had each headed out to spend the evening doing something entertaining, but to her regret she’d made the choice to stay hom...

ROYAL REWARD: The Collector: Rem and Ram (Inanimate TF, Expansion, Futanari, Re:Zero)

Bending over, her hip-axles creaking, Fabia handed her mistress a cup of tea in the shape of a giant vagina. Shushuka snatched it off the platter, took a deep sip, and sighed in delight. “Ah, lovely, nya. Nyow, where were we…?” 

Frowning, she turned to the saucer’s monitor. “Oh, that’s right! I was just about to grab my latest batch of collectables!” Giggling, she tappe...

Instant Cosplay Love Doll Deception (TG, Sexdoll TF)

Futanari crept into the conventional hall with a thin smirk on her face and a massive erection between her legs, her ninja-field flickering as she slipped between the stalls.  

As she snuck, she savored the cosplayers on display–from the Ochakos to the Namis to the Nobaras and the Krillins–until at last she found herself in an empty spot perfect for her purposes. Skidding to...

ROYAL REWARD: Wand of Inflation (Inflation)

Xillia smiled as she marched through the field, her boots crunching the grass beneath her soles. Looking up at the clear blue expanse above, she sighed in delight. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky–it was a perfect day, and she couldn’t wait to take advantage of it. 

Lowering herself to the ground, she folded her legs, placed her hands quite firmly on her knees, and closed her ey...