The Trashgirl Diaries: Hard Fun
Your humble Trashgirls talk hard stuff!
2023-11-15 16:15:59 +0000 UTC View Post
jimquisition posts
Apology Graphics, Rise Of Kong, And Regulating Bad Games (The Jimquisition)
Skull Island: Rise of Kong has quickly become a legend of bad videogame lore. Astoundingly unfinished garbage, it's giving even that dreadful Gollum game a run for its money. In a year of abysmal videogames, many of which inspired Solemn JPEG apology graphics, let's start wondering if game quality needs some sort of standard enforcement.
2023-11-13 15:50:10 +0000 UTC View PostSkull Island: Rise Of Kong - Ape Shit (Review)
I finally got around to reviewing Skull Island: Rise of Kong (a game that's getting a little bit of a spotlight this coming Monday, too). CLICK HERE to read the review of what many are calling Gollum's closest contender for worst game of 2023!
2023-11-11 18:05:46 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 464: Missed Connections
Like (smuggling) ships passing in the night.
Games we played this week include:
Alan Wake II (5:05)
Thirsty Suitors (17:05)
Robocop: Rogue City (35:05)
Dave the Diver (38:55)
WarioWare: Move It (1:07:50)
Alan Wake 2 - Garth Marenghi's Darkplace (Review)
I found Alan Wake 2 insufferable. Having completed it and spent time thinking about the experience, I don't believe I'll ever understand what possessed Remedy to make a game that derails itself so frequently and moronically. CLICK HERE to read my review.&nb...
2023-11-09 09:46:39 +0000 UTC View PostRoboCop: Rogue City - Creeper Hit (Review)
If Terminator: Resistance was an enjoyable Fallout-lite, then developer Treyon's crack at the RoboCop whip is a similarly enjoyable bit of faux Deus Ex. I am loving what this studio has been doing with 80s movie licenses, and you can read all my thoughts on Rogue City if you CL...
2023-11-07 16:35:32 +0000 UTC View PostSilent Hill: Ascension Is F*cking Disgusting The Jimquisition
Konami is Konami, and Konami is the worst. Once again plundering a beloved franchise in the grossest way possible, the company has inflicted Silent Hill: Ascension onto the world - a monetized cutscene that takes microtransactions to a new and sickening low. It's really, really bad.
2023-11-06 15:04:21 +0000 UTC View PostStray Souls - Stray The Hell Away (Review)
Oh yes, I reviewed the awful thing! Stray Souls is one of the worst horror games of all time, and I deliver a critical beating to this mess of store-bought assets and A.I. generated art. CLICK HERE for the full teardown!
2023-11-03 18:55:37 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 462: Looking for Daddy
Somebody is going to need to step up.
Games we played this week include:
Alan Wake II (6:10)
Dave the Diver (47:22)
Robocop (54:14)
Spin Rhythm XD (1:07:50)
Lords of the Fallen (1:09:25)
Lords Of The Fallen - Fall Me Twice (Review)
I didn't expect to say Lords of the Fallen is one of my favorite Soulslikes, but here we are! It took the name of a mediocre knock-off and proved itself a bloody good knock-off, and I've been thoroughly absorbed by it. Check out my review by CLICKING HERE!
2023-11-01 18:54:27 +0000 UTC View PostStray Souls: A Bad Game Made By Bad People (The Jimquisition)
Stray Souls is an absolutely terrible horror game. With its baffling bugs, nonsensical writing, A.I. art, suppression of criticism, and hateful director, it truly is one of the worst games of the year. Oh what spooky Halloween fun!
2023-10-30 20:49:57 +0000 UTC View PostSuper Mario Bros. Wonder - Flower Power (Review)
Super Mario Bros. Wonder is a very good game, if one with a very frantic distribution of content. I reviewed it, of course, and you can CLICK HERE to read that review!
2023-10-28 09:17:19 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 461: The Bad Pop
That part isn’t supposed to do that.
Games we played this week include:
Super Mario Bros. Wonder (8:15)
Sonic Superstars (38:45)
Sorry, We’re Closed (40:10)
Ebenezer and the Invisible World (44:25)
Vampire Survivors (4925:30)
Meta Quest 3 (49:50)
Smash Drums (51:05)
Metal Gear Solid Master Collection (52:55)
The Trashgirl Diaries: Has Porn Gone Woke?!?!?
We ask the hard questions... hard like an erect penis (boner).
2023-10-25 15:09:57 +0000 UTC View PostMarvel's Spider-Man 2 - Miles Apart (Review)
I have written my review for Marvel's Spider-Man 2! A great game, held back by some spotty writing that fumbles its payoffs, but still provides plenty of good stuff.
Read all about it by CLICKING HERE!
2023-10-24 19:40:33 +0000 UTC View PostCreative Abandoned: Why Sonic Has So Many Bad Games (The Jimquisition)
Sonic the Hedgehog is notorious for having a library of absolutely terrible games. The worst part is, whenever they run the risk of having something good on their hands, they throw it in the trash! That's what we're talking about today - why Sonic has so many bad games, and why Sega needs to stop going back to the drawing board.
2023-10-23 16:05:57 +0000 UTC View PostSonic Superstars - Keep It Simple, Sonic! (Review)
I reviewed Sonic Superstars and I liked it! Well, mostly. The bosses are dreadful. Why not CLICK HERE and read my full review?
2023-10-20 19:51:39 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 460: Let’s Get Wet
Utterly drenched.
Games we played this week include:
Super Mario Bros. Wonder (8:30)
Sonic Superstars (18:30)
Amanda the Adventurer (37:15)
Spider-Man 2 (39:50)
Lords of the Fallen (47:30)
Warhammer 40,000: Darktide - A Lighter Shade Of Grimdark (Review)
I reviewed Warhammer 40K: Darktide. Somethin' to do, innit? Check it out by CLICKING HERE!
2023-10-18 14:44:20 +0000 UTC View PostMicrosoft Bought Activision And That's Terrible (The Jimquisition)
The saga is over and the misery begins! Microsoft just bought Activision in the biggest buyout in game industry history. I am disgusted. Let's discuss why it's horrid!
2023-10-16 12:57:30 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 459: Live Reptile Birth
This is all on the up and up, we promise.
Games we played this week include:
PS5 Access Controller (8:30)
Elemental Survivors (22:15)
Warhammer 40k: Darktide (33:50)
Stardew Valley (36:55)
GWAR: Rumble in Antarctica (40:30)
Forza Motorsport 2023 (44:10)
A Tiny Sticker Tale (55:00)
Whisker Squadron: Survival (57:05)
Another Crab’s Treasure (58:50)
El Paso, Elsewhere - Max Pain (Review)
El Paso, Elsewhere is a game like no other, despite being a game EXACTLY like another. This Max Payne clone spoke to me on a deeply personal level with its poignant and excellently written themes of emotional abuse and addiction. Plus it has vampires. Read my full review by CLICKIN...
2023-10-10 17:22:47 +0000 UTC View PostThe Game Industry Hides How Bad The Really Bad Layoffs Are (The Jimquisition)
The game industry layoffs are really bad, but according to testimony gathered for The Jimquisition, it's far worse than they look. It's all thanks for the nasty tactics companies employ to obscure layoffs behind other forms of job termination.
2023-10-09 13:29:04 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 458: Semi-Conscious Life
I want something else. Like a bed.
Games we played this week include:
El Paso Elsewhere (8:30)
Amanda the Adventurer (30:00)
Model Builder (35:00)
Deep Rock Galactic Survivor (49:30)
Forza Motorsport 2023 (56:20)
Dynasty Warriors 9 (1:02:10)
Helldivers (1:05:30)
Baldur's Gate 3 - Elven Enby Bardic Dickgirls (Review)
I could have been timely, but I preferred to take my time.
Yes, I finally wrote a review for Baldur's Gate 3... though I might have smuggled in some commentary about the state of videogame criticism. Purely in the interests of making sure the review had something to say in spite of how "late" it might be, of course.
Fiscal Responsibility, Or How Game Publishers Keep Painting Themselves Into A Monetary Corner Before Punishing Everybody Else For Their Short-Sighted F**king Stupidity (The Jimquisition)
Epic Games laid off over 800 people because management decided to gamble on Metaverse Magic Beans. Capcom's boss thinks game prices are too low. What do these two things have in common? They're examples of how industry leaders are irresponsible with their money and pass the consequences onto anybody but themselves.
Also, a special friend returns to The Jimquisition...
Podquisition 456: Absentee Landlord
Worship that? Never.
Games we played this week include:
Payday 3 (12:30)
Amanda the Adventurer (18:25)
Rewind or Die (24:30)
Sniper Killer (26:40)
Train Sim World 4 (34:00)
Pinball Wicked (36:55)
Xenotilt (38:55)
Trombone Champ (41:10)
Halls of Torment (46:50)
Paying To Play Early: Gaming's Sad New Scam (The Jimquisition)
Videogames are increasingly trying to get you to preorder or purchase expensive deluxe editions in exchange for "early access" to a game several days before its official launch date. This latest trend is a sure sign that, as publishers desperately try to keep squeezing blood from the same shriveled stone, they're running out of aggressive monetization schemes.
2023-09-25 14:54:04 +0000 UTC View PostPodquisition 456: Extra Vocal Support
It’s really important you know that they’re on your side.
Games we played this week include:
Lies of P (16:00)
Solar Ash (17:35)
F-Zero 99 (20:20)
Nun Massacre (27:10)
No One Lives Under the Lighthouse (27:35)
Blood Wash (31:40)
Trombone Champ (39:55)
Gloomhaven (42:05)
MythForce (47:05)
Mythforce - Disasters Of The Universe (Review)
I reviewed Mythforce, a shoddy and ill-conceived game that runs shockingly poorly and is woefully inauthentic about its "Saturday morning cartoon" vibes. You can read about it by CLICKING HERE!
2023-09-20 14:43:11 +0000 UTC View Post