Stephen King: submitted for the
Elon Musk: [rising from bushes] eyyyyy itsa me, elon muska!
Barker: oh look steve, it's your friend
King: we're not friends
King: we're barely acquaintances!
Musk: eyyy da twitter gotta de bots
Musk: de too many bots!
Musk: de only way i can stoppa de bots
Musk: i gotta make everyone watch de prager u anti-trans propaganda
Mu...
Neil Gaiman: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the limitless reaches of the human imagination
Gaiman: for where are we truly free to imagine? in dreams!
Gaiman: for the dreamscape is the playground of the inner child
Gaiman: but what if the concept of dreaming
Gaiman: was this real cool goth guy
Aaron Alexovich: yes
Neil Gaiman: and...
2023-11-01 18:07:53 +0000 UTC View PostSapphire Lazuli: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, if you would, i call this the tale of the king in yellow
HP Lovecraft: oh! this is my favorite!
Lazuli: ah but
Lazuli: this is the tale of the king in yellow film adaptation
Lazuli: as it were
Lazuli: but perhaps i'm getting ahead of myself
King: wow, a movie that makes you go insane to see it! ...
2023-10-31 18:28:51 +0000 UTC View PostEpisode one of Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Pals aka S01E01: The Tale of the Frankenstein is now available for your listening pleasure!! Check it out!
Mary Shelley tells her Midnight Pals a chilling tale about a brilliant young ...
2023-10-30 22:36:53 +0000 UTC View PostJoe Hill: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society I call this the tale of the really creative guy and his vampire car
King: wow that’s the chip off the old block! I’m proud of you
Barker: oh god not another horror car
Hill: so there’s a type of people called “strong creatives” that have cool and disgusting superpowers
Hill: the bad guy uses a really cool c...
Stephen King: you guys, have you read the new JK Rowling book?
King: this cormorant strike is just incredible stuff!
King: it's amazing that she still finds time to write!
King: since she's probably busy with other stuff
King: i really haven't checked
King: not really sure what she's doing when she's not writing cormorant strike
King: probably normal writer things
...
King: after witnessing the virgin birth of dracula i sure feel like i got the halloween spirit
Debbie Dadey: [pushing glasses up bridge of nose] actually
Dadey: for your information, sir, there's no proof that was really dracula
Marcia Jones: indubitably my good sir
King: what are you talking about? he performed all the dracula miracles!
King: he walked on water! he turned...
Bradbury: you! ape! clown! cenobite! frankenstein! wolf man! italian!
Bradbury: why do you wear those costumes?
King: well, it's halloween, ray, you see-
Bradbury: no YOU do not see
Bradbury: do not see the magic, the mystery, the wonder
Bradbury: of halloween!
Bradbury: the calendar has many days but only one halloween!
Bradbury: can it be that you've forgotten? f...
[at Stephen King's halloween party]
Dean Koontz: hey guys! wow! thanks for letting me come to your party!
Barker: oh man you let dean come?
Barker: great, that's just great
Poe: now clive be nice
Barker: edgar he's going to cramp our style
Poe: it'll be fine clive
Koontz: hey whats this bottle for
Barker: its for spinning
Koontz: ohhhh
Koontz:
Koont...
Ray Bradbury: gone too soon!
Bradbury: the lazy summer afternoons picking dandelions by miller's pond forgotten, buried under an avalanche of adult responsibilities. No time for jump rope or blind man's bluff, there's a new game they play - a game of bills and forms and gray-faced men in suits.
Bradbury: ah! but tonight!
Bradbury: tonight
Bradbury: tonight will be
Bradbury...
Laurel Hightower: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the mothman
Hightower: and there's a trucker
Hightower: hmm there's a trucker
Tabitha King: so how does this work
Laurel Hightower: it’s just like old fashioned internet
Hightower: it’s the way that lonely but deliciously handsome truckers find love on the open road
...
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: you know if labor takess over, they're going to force you to ressspect transss people?
Barker: didn't keir starmer just literally throw them under the bus
Rowling:
Rowling: shut up
Rowling: sstop ruining thiss for me!
Rowling: asss i wass sssaying
Rowling: itss been reported in the reputable presssss
Rowling: that labor isss ...
Stephen King: listen guys
King: i'm kinda concerned that those bullies over at clarion west might try to pull something
King: so i've hired some security for the campfire
Poe: you what
Poe: steve why would you do that
King: no no trust me on this
King: so i hired the dorsai irregulars as security
Poe: the what
King: it's a special security force made up of ...
Jessica Leonard: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the church that hates witches
Leonard: so this guy's dad was a lawyer but he gave it all up to be a farmer
Leonard: and join a church
Leonard: this guy just really loves church
Leonard: this farmer guy is all "hey i love tilling the soil, i'm gonna do that"
Ursula Vernon: right right, ...
[mysterious circle of robed figures]
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: today we continue our quessst to rehabilitate glinner
Rowling: i will not ressst until he isss reintegrated into ssociety
Rowling: and not ssleeping on my couch anymore
Rowling: cuz you know
Rowling: that man isss
Rowling: i mean ssure i hate transs people too
Rowling: but i have other interessts...
RA Busby: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the corporate body
Busby: so this guy volunteers for a drug study
Busby: run by a not-at-all shady corporation
Busby: called drugco
Busby: that's just a placeholder name, i'll probably go back and change it
Busby: this guy needs money
Busby: cuz time are tough, you know
Busby: with the ...
Stephen King: hey did you hear that thomas wrote an x files episode?
Barker: what? which one?
King: oh i think
King: i think it was called
King: 'thomas ligotti is from outer space' or something
Barker:
Barker: yeah i don't think it was called that
King: i heard you wrote an x files episode
Thomas Ligotti: hm
King: you know, i once wrote an x files episode myself
Guillermo del Toro: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, I call this the tale of frankenstein del Toro: but this time del T
Guillermo del Toro: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, I call this the tale of frankenstein
del Toro: but this time
del Toro: there's a little twist
del Toro: the twist is that frankenstein is hot
del Toro: see, wha...
2023-10-09 16:49:04 +0000 UTC View PostStephen King: happy birthday clive!!!
King: we all got together and-
Clive Barker: my birthday was yesterday
King:
King: what
King: your birthday was yesterday?
Barker: yes
King:
King: oh ha ha ha
King: i get it!
King: he's fucking with us!
King: you're fucking with us right?
King: well jeez i feel really terrible about this
Barker: that's ok steve
Stephen Graham Jones: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the girl who’s obsessed with slashers
Jones: there’s this girl who just constantly talks about slashers
Barker: oh that sounds really annoying
Jones:
Barker: like that sounds SO annoying
Jones: so one day she thinks she might be in the middle of her own slasher movie
Jones:...
Panos Cosmatos: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the retro 70s sci fi horror pastiche
Cosmatos: just to warn you, it's gonna be pretty slow and boring
Cosmatos: so this might be better if you're high
Fitz James O'Brien: oh yeah way ahead of you man
Cosmatos: ok so imagine it's the 80s
Cosmatos: and imagine all the colors are really bl...
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: i want you to sssay hello to
Rowling: graham lineham
Lineham: [wearing foil hat] free masons run the country
Rowling: he'sss got sssome great ideasss you should hear
Poe: joanne you don't need to bring him here
Poe: like, you really don't
Rowling: he hass thingsss to sssay and you're ALL going to hear them
Poe: this is really...
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: tonight I'm going to tell you more about cormorant ssstrike's latessst adventure
King: there's more?
Rowling: there'sss lotss more
Rowling: itsss 961 pagesss
Rowling: do not give me sshit sssteve
Rowling: you of all people
Rowling: in thiss book, cormorant ssstrike makesss a whole lot of phone callsss and hangss out in a whole bu...
2023-10-01 19:03:49 +0000 UTC View Post[mysterious circle of robed figures]
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: i have a new ssstory for you tonight
Rowling: a new ssstory of cormorant ssstrike
Jesse Singal: wow mommy it's great!
Maya Forstater: the greatest story ever told
Rowling:
Rowling: well i haven't told it yet
Helen Joyce: i'm not exaggerating when i say that this is 100% the best story ever...
2023-09-30 18:45:09 +0000 UTC View PostDon't forget! It's coming! Living and dead horror authors tell scary stories round the campfire in “Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Pals”, an upcoming audio adaptation of Bitter Karella’s Hugo-nominated comedy-horror microfiction.
Full episodes start releasing on October 31, 2023, with an early premier and cast chat streaming on Twitch on Su...
Premee Mohamed: [wearing lab coat and goggles] according to my calculations, this story is about the technology of the near future
King: wow! are you really a scientist?
Mohamed: according to my calculations, yes
King: wow!
King: hey, as a scientist, you’ll love this
King: have you seen margaret Atwood’s writing machine?
Mohamed: is this AI
Mohamed: hello girl
Mo...
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: i have excellent newssss
Rowling: the british people have decided that harry potter hassss the greatesssst opening line of all time
Poe:
King:
Barker:
Lovecraft:
Koontz:
Rowling: jussst a real top opening line
Rowling: a real banger
Barker: oh yeah? is that right?
Poe: clive
Barker: no no no let's hear this
HP Lovecraft: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the scary painting
Lovecraft: so this guy makes a painting that's SO scary
Barker: oh yeah? what's so scary about it?
Lovecraft: here i'll
Lovecraft: i'll show you
Lovecraft: [scribbling on paper] here, i'll just draw it for you
Lovecraft: there!
Barker:
Barker: ahahahahah...
HP Lovecraft: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the story of the pickman's model
Lovecraft: what if there was a painting so scary
Lovecraft: like it was so scary
Lovecraft: like SO scary
Lovecraft: so there's this painting that's SO scary you can't look at it
Barker: what happens if you look at it
Barker: do you go insane
Lovecraft:
Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of
Elon Musk: [emerging from bushes] eeeey stephano king
Barker: hey look steve it's your best pal!
King:
King: do we have to keep doing this
King: we've had like literally 2 interactions ever
Musk: so stephano king you say you no pay $8 for twitter
King: no elon i am not going to...