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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0099

TRS - Casefile #0099

Anonymous asks: It is starkly apparent that you are in possession of a fine sense of humour and a rapier-like wit, so please, Mr. Riddler, what is your stance on comedy? Do you see it as a meaningless pass time for the mindless coddled masses, or as one of the most complex, courageous, and misunderstood arts?

(laughs) Well anonymous, y...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0098

TRS - Casefile #0098

EDWARD: Valoscope asks: I'm not as familiar with your back story as I probably ought to be, but I recalled something about you working on television game shows before your conversion to a more criminal career, or was it work in video games? Either way, do you have any interest in one or both of these things? And, nerdchicka asks: Greetings, My. Nygma...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0097

TRS - Casefile #0097

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: What do you think of Two-Face? And, anonymous asks: How do you feel about Two-Face? And, anonymous asks: What do you have to say about working with Two-Face? And, Snowkhione asks: What is your relationship with Two-Face? I know there are some things that you can't stand about him, but really I'm curious nonetheless. And, anony...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0096

TRS - Casefile #0096

EDWARD: Queen-derp-a-lot asks: Here's a little something for you: I am the end to all relationships alike. I am the meaning behind the glare in your eyes, and the fuel to the anger in your stomach, yet I am a completely normal reaction. What am I? And, umbrella-tales asks: Riddler sir! I found quite peculiar the fact that despite your invitations, no...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0095

TRS - Casefile #0095

EDWARD: Chimneysweepsthehipstergiraffe asks: Does it pain you terribly every time the Batman trumps you in intelligence and strength (which is almost always)? And, nightswing asks: If you're as great as you claim, why is the Batman always able to catch you? And, psmroguesobsessed asks: So you're the smartest in Gotham as everyone's said, but why woul...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0094

TRS - Casefile #0094

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: What was your first kiss like?

Hmm. Shall I? Maybe if I - No. No, I don't think I'm going to answer this one. There's just too many ways to twist it. Honestly, I prefer an actual challenge. This wouldn't be shooting fish in a barrel, it would be throwing a stick of dynamite into a goldfish bowl. I suppose I coul...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0093

TRS - Casefile #0093

EDWARD: Addisonoftheblacknote asks: I'm sorry, but I was a little disappointed in the placement of the Riddler trophies in Arkham City. They seemed to be pretty easy to spot and more often that not were out in the open. Was this intentional? Did you try to maybe make things a little easier for Batman? I felt you did such a nice job with them in Arkha...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0092

TRS - Casefile #0092

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Edward, where do you get all of your confidence from? Do you have any advice for a person with low self-esteem?

(scoffs) Edward Nygma: Therapist! This makes an interesting change from Edward Nygma: Legally Considered Unfit to Stand Trial. Confidence, anonymous, is unique to everyone. I personally have been analy...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0091

TRS - Casefile #0091

EDWARD: Marcharig asks: What was your greatest disappointment in life?

You see, the wonderful thing about this question is that it sets up its own punchline. I could say, "people who don't use spell check" and get away free and clear, because that's exactly the response people expect from me. Scornful, and sarcastic, with a minimum of ...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0090

TRS - Casefile #0090

EDWARD: Diableret asks: Hi Riddler - As a man with tattoos (or at least I'm led to believe you have many), what are you views on body art on women? And, Diableret asks: How many tattoos do you have?

(sighs) Your informants have led you wrong, Diableret. Clearly you've been listening to old rumour. I do not, as it happens, have tattoos....

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0089

TRS - Casefile #0089

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Have you seen that guy with the green mohawk pretending to be you?

Oho, another one? I have to say, of the numerous Riddler impersonators I've seen over my career, I've never yet seen one with a green mohawk. I suppose I should applaud him for creativity. And then I should call the Iceberg and see who's running ...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0088

TRS - Casefile #0088

EDWARD: Theload asks: If you could murder Jonathan Crane, would you? If so, how? Personally, I'd just strangle him. And, anonymous asks: Do you think Jonathan Crane would be able to survive one of your death traps?

(laughs) Really, internet? What makes you think I'm just going to come out and admit the method I'd use to knock off a pro...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0087

TRS - Casefile #0087

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Pronounced as one letter, and written with three, two letters there are, and two only in me. I'm double, I'm single, I'm black, blue, and grey, I'm read from both ends and the same either way. What am I? And, paddedcell asks: I've attempted what you requested and have created you a riddle. I hope you enjoy it, and if you would...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0086

TRS - Casefile #0086

EDWARD: Mikodemus asks: I said I would ask you something, so here I go: Do you like to travel? Have you even been to northern Europe? Like Finland?

Ah Finland. Land of moose and 'twenty people in one bathroom' vodka parties. In case you haven't guessed by now, Mikodemus, no. I've never been to Finland. I understand it's known for being...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0085

TRS - Casefile #0085

EDWARD: Chickenhax asks: Do you monitor your fellow villains? Would you know where, um, Two-Face is at the moment, and what he's up to?

If you're asking whether I have cameras on them 24/7 then no, Chickenhax, I'm afraid you'll be disappointed. But do I make it my business to stay informed? Of course. Information is power and in certai...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0084

TRS - Casefile #0084

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Do you still have the hots for Catwoman? And anonymous asks: What do you think of Catwoman? And Mooseings asks: Now I may just be looking a little too much into a bedtime story, but it wouldn't surprise me if it was indeed a riddle wrapped up in a children's story. It sounds to me like you have some issues with Catwoman, or sh...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0083

TRS - Casefile #0083

EDWARD: Murderermarv asks: What are your thoughts on Mr. Zsasz's methods?

Zsasz is an interesting case, though that's rather a broad way of describing it. He's 'interesting', let's say, in the same way certain children are 'special'. Looking at him on the surface, one could almost be disappointed. We've become so used to the colourful ...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0082

TRS - Casefile #0082

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: What are some of your favourite books? And, anonymous asks: What's your favourite book? And, hewtab asks: What is your favourite book?

My favourite book is one that I don't intend to name here. As free as I might be with certain pieces of information on other topics, there's no point in handing the Arkham psychi...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0081

TRS - Casefile #0081

EDWARD: Professorjervistetch asks: March Hare! It is so lovely to see that you've joined the big tea party! You're a bit late! Don't worry - I saved some for you!

Now here's a quandary - to believe, or not to believe? Am I to tell myself that the Mad Hatter, much like myself, has taken to the Internet for some unknown yet devious purpo...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0080

TRS - Casefile #0080

EDWARD: Diableret asks: Do you like ice cream?

(pause) Are you serious? Completely, utterly, and straightforwardly serious? I thought the question about pets were... You are serious, aren't you? Ladies and gentlemen on the internet - let me be frank for a minute. I am a genius. Call it hubris, call me overconfident, but I have the numb...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0079

TRS - Casefile #0079

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: I've got a riddle in my pants - Want to solve it?

No. I believe I recently stated that I have standards. Next question.

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0078

TRS - Casefile #0078

EDWARD: Paddedcell asks: How does it feel to be the real challenge for Batman in both the Asylum and Arkham City, and yet remain rather unacknowledged for the brainpower put into your masterful duels with him? And, anonymous asks: Does it bother you that many people, Batman included, consider his true rival the Joker? Whereas you're often seen as a d...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0077

TRS - Casefile #0077

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Have you ever committed a sexual assault on a woman before? Sorry if it's a bit candid. You are a criminal, after all.

Honestly? Do I have to grab you by collar anonymous, and tattoo the words: "THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE" on your forehead? Because I'm beginning to think that some of my listeners might need it! Becau...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0076

TRS - Casefile #0076

EDWARD: Damianfuckingstark asks: Do you have a favourite partner in crime, or do you only work with your fellow rogues if you absolutely need to? And, anonymous asks: If you had to team up with a fellow villain, who would it be? And, anonymous asks: Hey, do you know any other villain you'd be willing to, like, team up with? And, itseasytoremember ask...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0075

TRS - Casefile #0075

EDWARD: Umbaby asks: Were you in Arkham when Mr. Bolton was in charge? What, if you don't mind me asking, was your experience of it?

Ahahaha, yes - Lyle Bolton. Or, as he calls himself now: Lockup. It was rather gratifying to see him get dragged past my cell, kicking and screaming, swearing vengeance on everyone who'd wronged him, and ...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0074

TRS - Casefile #0074

EDWARD: Anonymous asks: Did you date any of your secretaries when you were a private investigator?

Not as such. You see, while dating a sharp-tongued secretary might have fulfilled every red-blooded man's dream of being the hard-boiled private detective, the secretary in question needs to be amenable. Mine were not. That's not to say w...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0073

TRS - Casefile #0073


EDWARD: Iwillpostnothing asks: You've made it abundantly clear that the intelligence of the average citizen isn't exactly up to snuff. Is there anything you propose can be done about it? And, ofrantingandrobots asks: Would you consider the average Gotham citizen unintelligent by normal standards, or do they simply seem that way when compar...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0072

TRS - Casefile #0072

Anonymous asks: Please give us the birds and the bees story.

(sigh) Alright. If you insist - but honestly, your parents should be telling you these things. I really don't think strangers on the internet are the most appropriate source for this kind of explanation. Birds and egg-laying, vertebrate mammals of the class Avis. Their most c...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0071

TRS - Casefile #0071

8bitwrestler asks: Allow me to apologise for my simple question in advance, but due to my love of cinema and film, I couldn't help but wonder: Who would you want to play yourself in a movie? And, shesagraceyouwish asks: If someone was to play you in a film, who would you want to play you?

The Riddler on film - now that's a terrifying t...

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The Riddler Speaks - Casefile #0070

TRS - Casefile #0070

Wonderlandshouseoftricks asks: Do you have any musical preference? And, askpluckybecky asks: Good evening, Riddler, as I hear you're not fond of the title "Mister". Is there a certain genre you enjoy listening to? And, Diableret asks: Hello Mr. Nygma - What is your favourite song? All the best and hope you bring down the bat soon, Di. And, anonymous ...

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