Puss in Boots vs The Cat in the Hat - EARLY AUDIO

Early audio for ANIMATION VS ANYTHING: CH. III, Episode 4 - Puss in Boots vs The Cat in the Hat.

Lyrics:

Puss in Boots:

Folks claim he’s best of clothed fame

Dressed to impress, and head to toe draped

From the feather in his cap, the eyes, face and the purr

The danger in his genes, and the boots with the fur

I am Puss in Boots! Hola and ole

You’re next to know I am next to no name (ha)

Legend to MAP, let me give you advice

Go hitchhike to the Wishing Star and get a life (ha)

El Macho Gato, patea tu culo

Keeping you Far, Far Away from a school zone

Frisky Two Times with the kids at the door

They don’t wanna hear you say Thinga-ma-jigger no more

Now I’m catching this stray, tossing him out on the street

What kind of cat needs help getting back on his feet

Yes, I draw first blood, like the doctor’s answer

And I go for the throat like your author’s cancer (ha)

The Cat in the Hat:

My, that was lots of good fun (said the Cat.) That was fun that was funny, in fact (hm)

But one thing to know about me (said the Cat.) is that I tend to always come back 

(OH YEAHH!)

(Cat in the what?)

I keep two things in the back brick

Quick to make you disappear like a hat track

(Cat in the what?)

Begged Shrek, asked him “bring back the magic”

You’re not a classic, Cat in the Hat is

(Cat in the what?)

My my, you haven’t faced time kindly

Got nine lives - it looks like you’ve lived ninety

How did you get packed up by a lone wolf, bro

Better pack it up and move back to the old folks’ home

I’m just checking in since your parents are missing

I’m family friendly, you’ve been after kitties

‘Cuz the altar escape put your marriage on a soft pause

It altered your mate, now it’s as if Kitty’s got claws

Reunited again with Perrito

But she’s not impressed by your little gatito

And she knows that she won’t compete with your ego

So next time you die - (adios, amigo!)

Puss in Boots:

Life is a journey and death is a given

The pages are turned as our stories are written

Your legacy’s tethered to Seuss’s estate

And defaced by the hatred he paved in his place

It has been a lifetime since the Doctor was in

And his racism tainted the pages he penned

As he propped propaganda art for armed citizens

Death of the author caught the dog whistling

Mejor empaca tus cosas si me cuelo en tu balcón 

Todo el daño a la propiedad que hay en mi casa lo hago yo 

Tu live action hizo que hasta la señora Seuss se ralle 

Ni Shrek hizo ver tan desagradable a Mike Myers

Fight me if must, flee me if you’re scared

Face me if you can, fear me if you dare

You’re done running away, the kids have had enough

I’m dropping the mic - now, pick it up

The Cat in the Hat:

Pick it up? Gladly! I’ll pick up the flow

To diss this misfit? Oh, The Places I’ll Go

You call me a stray? You’re an orphan

Who stole from his own hometown for his fortune, then scorned it

Alexander banked on you to free him but you didn’t

You ran from the militia and abandoned him in prison

Took the greatest of falls into the plan that he was hatching

Soon as you tried to get laid, he got you back

And now all the horses and (men) could never begin to (mend)

Or put you and Humpty’s (friend)ship back together (again)

Buddy has been stalking before the beanstalk

And better believe bested you ‘till his scheme stopped and he dropped

Now, what would you do when brother’s plans were foiled

Couldn’t take the fall, you made him take it for you

Unless you mend fences a whole awful lot

Then your legacy’s end is once Death has you caught