Episode 27: Spectre

"Smart Blood" gave me fucking conniptions; this whole podcast I've been putting together Bond's influence on Metal Gear Solid, but this is just fully nanomachine injections from MGS4 released 6 years prior (or Revengeance 2 years prior with its cyborg blood).

Luke

I’ve realized why this movie is incredibly funny to me, it’s because the big Blofeld twist is literally a worse version of a plot twist that happened in my D&D group. That actually had genuine weight behind the reveal and provided real character revelations, this is just the cheapest plot convenience in a long line of plot convinces for this stupid series

Lay-Tex-Lips

Okay, so my wife had to explain that ring thing to me. It was because in their autopsies they all showed trace amounts of the same material the ring was made of. Still completely bizarre and poorly explained.

Chandler Hull

This film is dedicated to the brave fighters in the mujahadeen.

Cate Kneale

please fit in some johnny english before the end!!

Devon mentions that this movie alternates between yellow filter and blue filter around 55 minutes in That's actually because this movie is fiercely pro Ukraine

British Pterodactyl

finally listened to the episode and holy shit, you're really doing bourne? very hyped my prime kids dunk that you put on twitter secured more than i could ever have anticipated

Christine Pizan

the (pretty packed) cinema I was in gave a big laugh when everyone though M was gonna say "cunt". same with everyone I've spoken to afterwards. they didn't even need to *use* the word - it could've just been insinuation! such a poorly written movie

HJC

Thanks - I didn't want to go through all the episodes again to put those on a spreadsheet. Now I can get some aggregated statistics on the series. Edit: For a taste, the highest average score is in Misogyny, which averages 5.32 with the smallest standard deviation at 1.68. Edit (2): You can find a breakdown of mean and standard deviation for SCUM scores by Bond Actor here: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/e/2PACX-1vQLzLDqzo6kmKT5WvCY6gyc2ae1kHmYPSamGRrxjXx6DIRssFWJ3Ai4QUQNMbRamsC5AdkYnmmPNsdt/pubhtml?gid=146980562&single=true

Violet

I knew this was going to be a good one as soon as Alice said "Piss Christ".

Cate Kneale

for anyone interested i do in fact maintain a spreadsheet of SCUM, https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1Y_F6enB-STpIOHhLDiH1f8qBSdclWRpj1dCbvtI-cko/edit?usp=sharing, ive editorialised somewhat in places EDIT: Should i ever reach a suicidal level of boredom i might put in the pussy clock on each of these EDIT 2: I have started with the pussy clocks EDIT 3: I have finished adding the pussy clocks, i wrote that first edit like 8 hours ago, no time to die is weirdly the only bond where he doesnt fuck anyone that isnt a pre-established relationship, for details on methodology see below the spreadsheet, i also turned comments on cuz why the fuck not

Login

No awards this time? Well, I guess you covered that during the recap - Tanner finally gets the Goodnight, and Bond himself gets the Kronsteen for killing Craig Fingersuck.

JoeNotCharles

No awards this time?

JoeNotCharles

I genuinely loathe how similar my last name and Blofeld's original last name are

Hannah Oberhardt

every time you all say "mitchell" i spend several seconds wondering why you hadn't already said that joe don baker was in this movie and then several seconds repenting for having forgotten about james bond's best buddy

God's Eepiest Soldier

I saw this movie the night it came out and I have never been angrier at a movie, and I kept leaning over to my girlfriend to say what movie they're ripping off now.

Moira

"Double-0 Fritzl" really didn't get the laughs it deserved.

JustMatt

I’d say Royale and Solace are Corbyn 2017-18, Skyfall is the 2019 election- a thorough drubbing of all the great possibilities by empty flag waving jingoistic bluster. And yeah, Spectre is absolutely Starmer. Entirely devoid of ideas and dull as dishwasher. What that makes No Time To Die I have no idea. Partygate somehow?

dm

I lost my virginity in a 1976 Sciarra Marco, which was Zastava's unsuccessful challenge to the Yugo.

FortressPlotter

as a "joke" i looked up plane ticket costs to fly from the US to London in April for the live show and they are so so low I'm now debating on doing this as a birthday gift to myself. i feel like I should be talked out of this.

George Rohac

imagining the meeting between spectre and their subsidiary organisation quantum 'i want you to acquire bolivia's water supply' 'sure thing boss' 'but make sure you leave enough breadcrumbs bond can tag along as its important destroying your scheme takes him on an emotional journey' 'errrr okay boss'

Christine Pizan

haven't listened to this video yet but goddamn I fucking hated this movie when it came out As a known fan of Quantum to the point of defending about 60% of the action scenes (which are quite greengrass like imo some of the time) Skyfall was laughing at my preference for the more grounded and dark plot, Spectre is pissing on it while laughing We have the absurd gadgets, we have a woman do the tightpussy 'not every woman wants to fuck you james' and then fuck him ten minutes later, we have the wacky torture and volcano bases, we have a dark knight style 'your life or the girl' bond with a fucking 3 minute timer, eugh. Worse than being a bad movie in its own right, it rewrites quantum and casino to make them both worse. Instead of those plots being for the stated reason at the time (make money to pay back terrorists/seize control of a valuable asset to make big bank) its now all part of blofelds plot to make jamie bonds (who like a fucking alex rider book knows bond from childhood, of course) feel depressed and anxious fuck off

Christine Pizan

Blofeld's cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs

British Pterodactyl

Yes! I watched this film in prep for your take and wow, there is literally no plot. The whole Nine eyes thing happens in the background and there is no driving force behind any of he scenes beyond "there's 2 hours left of the movie so guess Next Location". The villain is taken out so suddenly with zero stakes and overall its just bland. Good opening scene and that's about it.

Delta357

I'm curious to see where you guys go with "season 2". I am absolutely delighted every week and will happily throw my money at the patreon forever to hear you three go off on any movies you pick. I will say Devon mentioning RotF has me lowkey hoping you all tackle the Transformers movies at some point. They are such bad movies and deserve all of the hate they get

Orlando

Now that we've got Christoph Waltz Blofeld, you've got to come back to Robert Rodriguez movies and give us your Battle Angel Alita takes.

Martin Zarate

Jason Borm

Stiltpuppy

When I watched this movie I muted the theme and played the Radiohead one out of spite

Skate Bush

54:49 the ring is the soggy biscuit lol

Alfred Lang

34:06 i just like the idea that when ever blofeild goes to one of these things he just says that to see if james bond will jump out ... like its just part of the security protocol lol

Alfred Lang

I don’t disagree, but it’s a little late now lol

Wizard Michael

Considering how often Facial Disfigurement comes up, maybe you should try to include it in the SCUM system. Rating from 1 to 7 based on how consistently disfigured the bad guys are.

OvO Hoot

All of these events were secretly orchestrated by the protagonist's secret evil sibling? Sounds a lot like another series when Andrew Scott was the same guy.

-Kris-

I watched Spectre for the first time last night in preparation for todays episode. I weirdly liked it more than I thought I would. I like it better than Skyfall. Skyfall is a better made film, sure, but it’s such a bad movie. Spectre, while also bad, at least was interestingly bad. Curious to find out what KJB thought of it.

Mel Vitta

At least when Christoph Waltz had a double barreled pistol in The Green Hornet the movie had the decency to draw attention to it

-Kris-

pog

Helena McCoy