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KJB Holiday Special 2: Die Hard 2

Merry Christmas, Happy holidays, it's the KJB Holiday Special 2023! John McClane is back, and this time he's in an airport making a fucking

Merry Christmas, Happy holidays, it's the KJB Holiday Special 2023!
John McClane is back, and this time he's in an airport making a fucking nuisance of himself.

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KJB Holiday Special 2: Die Hard 2

Comments

"the Beretta that cannot penetrate wood." What are the odds that John brought Glasers because he was going on a plane?

-Kris-

There have been a few attempts at 3d printed guns which are almost entirely polymer (not porcelain) but you still run into needing metal ammo, a metal firing pin, and using only the weakest tiny ammo and it still blows up after a handful of shots. You could probably *technically* do a metal-free gun, but it would have to be something like a bamboo matchlock shooting a rock, which means you've circled all the way back to making a fire-lance to kill a Gorn.

-Kris-

I am disappointed that Abby, despite referring to Colm Meaney as Chief O' Brien, never once alluded to William Sadler being Sloane from Section 31. This is blatent DS9 erasure from Abby.

Gina Service

very sad y’all didn’t make a “Kiln James Bond” joke when talking about Gun Week on the Great Pottery Throw Down

Charles Cicchino

Porcelain Glock is what i'm going to start calling grenades

Amy

Fun fact: One of the terms used to refer to deconsecrating a church is “conversion to profane use,” which is both an absolutely S-tier description and also my New Year’s resolution for 2024.

THEM-ily Post

I honestly forgot that you did Die Hard 1 last year, so I thought you were going back to the rule of starting with the 2nd movie of each series, and that it was mildly clever to do Die Hard 2 for your Christmas movie bit instead of the more famous one. Ah, well.

JoeNotCharles

Wohoo! Finland mentioned (and 9/11)!

mimosalover69

hear me out: lethal weapon 2, if only so you can get the "diplomatic immunity!" drop. also the social commentary on apartheid that I'm sure aged flawlessly.

Anthony

tbh this movie has my favourite single shot of cinema: The wingtip vortex swirling through the smoke as john is running towards the landing planes.

OutbackCatgirl

I consider die hard 2 to be noticeably less christmassy than 1. with 1, you can say "it crisms!!" out loud dozens of times throughout the run time because it's intricately tied to those themes, right up till the final climax between hans and john with the Christmas tape, and through to the credits. 2? I found it hard to, after the initial setup until the final payoff music, say "it crispm!" this is how i judge christmas movies btw if i can enthusiastically go "it chrisamuus!!!" (both genuinely and ironically, see also 'now i have a machine gun. ho, ho, ho') then the movie is good at crispsamus and i am happy i like dh2 but the premise is fuckin hilariously silly given even rudimentary knowledge of how plane work and how airport work. I still love it for being ridiculous (that ending destroys me every time) and occasionally clever (blank mags reveal, though that's also kinda silly cuz the new guy in the bad squad musta been real green to not check his own load). It's a comfort movie in how it asks for suspension of disbelief in return for watching bruce willis get beat the fuck up and plane go boom.

OutbackCatgirl

As a former film & TV armourer I am so, so glad to have the egregious lack of accuracy surrounding firearms in this movie.

Ezra

Cutting a church in half like a demilled receiver

Noblesse Oblahaj

I can't believe they arrested General Anaesthesia

Noblesse Oblahaj

when I first saw this movie, the "changing the sea level" part really freaked me out. it's the only thing I remember about it

anamoy

Fortunately we won’t have to wait a year for Die Hard 3, since it is explicitly a Noo Yawk summer movie, not a Christmas movie.

Brian Taulbee

Merry christmas/happy holidays to the KJB crew thanks for your work

Freyr Aloysius

I know Alice has played Airport CEO, so she should know that all baggage that contains contraband immediately goes in the baggage destruction machine, I don't know why she's feigning ignorance on that.

Will Hitchcock

We here at [Redacted] Airlines have gotten a lot of questions about our baggage crasher machines.  First of all we hear you, we care about you, and we regret any uncertainty our operations have caused during this holiday season; in particular we regret the maimings and death our baggage crasher machines have been co-located to. So, for the record, our baggage crasher machines are a critical part of our environmental suitability commitments. Increasingly, baggage is bulky, and our planes may not have space for all of your checked items. Our state of the art baggage crasher machines, powered by renewable sources of electricty, allow us to make sure that your baggage, and the baggage of your loved ones, will absolutely make it onto the plane. We understand that crushed baggage may cause some people emotional distress.  And we at [Redacted] are sensitive to that. Please reach out to our chat bots, available 24 hours a day, to ask about our competitively priced premium baggage upgrades - where we promise we won't crush your bags. . . Thank you for continuing to hold us at [Redacted] to account.  We promise to have fewer maimings of our team members next fiscal quarter.

Za.Law

As a person who was born and bred in the Washington DC area, that is so fucking not Dulles International airport.

Doug King

Speaking of desecrated churches, a few years ago someone filmed a porn in a small country church not far from my town and since the parish only found out months later all the sacraments dispensed in that time ended up in a theological grey area

Luca

Glock 7: the kind of pistol that kilns you instantly

The Project Project

That's German for "The Hard 2".

OvO Hoot

The terror is a great series happy Devon is seeing it !

Schuylar Mills

If Jackie Chan was on that plane then 9/11 would have gone down differently I'll tell you that much

YungCereza

Always disappointed when I open my present and it doesn't emit a noxious gas

scara b

The guy getting crushed in the baggage carousel genuinely upset me when I was a child. Thankfully I grew up to be normal and have internalised the knowledge that some human beings need killin'.

Jack Fennell

Alice: "Devon? Do you have the CinemaSins "Ding"?" And this is when the podcast went from good to great!

Meonlights


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