Claptrap Chapter 33: Breaking the Law

“Are you done trying to break your face now?” Clappy asked impatiently as I rolled towards the dump yard

“Yep. Gonna have to invest in a few healing injectors or something since apparentlythey work on bots like us.” I groused as I began to fiddle with the Grinder. Clappy watched as I placed my Maliwan Incendiary Sniper, the Vladof Sniper, and a Torgue SAW onto the plates. I could sense his “eyebrow” rise as I crossed my metaphoric fingers, and flipped the switch.

The machine grinded, and spat out a random weapon which I hoped still worked as it did in the Pre-sequel. I cheered as it did exactly that. It gave me a Maliwan styled sniper, which had the Vladof ammunition cylinder, and gave me an “Elemental” effect of EXPLOSIONS!

Clappy couldn’t help but go “ooooooh~” as he looked down at the explosive sniper rifle. I scanned the weapon. It gave me an error before finally giving me an overall scan.

[quote]

Scan Complete

Searching archives…object found. Retrieving data. Data received.

Device: Grind’r modified weapon

Manufacturer: Maliwan, Vladof, Torgue.

Model: Custom

Yet another Frankenstein of a weapon. It utilizes a Maliwan Barrel / Stock as well as a Vladof Action / Magazine [Ammunition Storage]: Cylinder and of course an Elemental Effect: Explosive to top it all off.

Data Inserting…Combining style, with a large caliber, with a force multiplier of an explosive effect, this weapon is pretty much a sniper’s wet dream. Effective against larger, meaty targets, and even combat vehicles and armored personnel are easily handled if the shooter aims at the exposed portions of the target. It however is not good if you’re hunting for food, or trying to hit a single target, as explosive weapons tend to be overkill most of the time.

[/quote]

Colorful, but I wanted to know the mechanism which caused the bullets to explode. The weapon was lit up with a yellow on its elemental system so…how? I scanned the Elemental system specifically to get this answer.

[quote]

Scan Complete

The Incendiary Elemental System of this weapon has been ramped up to the highest level it could be in order to match the effects of the Torgue weapons EXPLOSIVE! Effect. It accomplishes this by using the Vladof = Magazine which reduces the number of munitions it is capable of firing over a period of time, and increasing the caliber of the round to allow more energy to be inserted from the system, allowing the bullet to reach critical mass. Upon the round hitting the target, there is a chance the round will undergo Fission, which will cause [Inserting Torgue] EXPLOSIONS! To the target and the surrounding area.

[/quote]

So…basically it could have done this with just the Maliwan weapon, but the explosive effect would have been reduced because of the smaller round and number of rounds fired. Using the Vladof parts increased it’s potential and damage all at once.

Dahl makes some awesome, and scary smart equipment if the Grinder can do this in a few seconds. Then again, if there’s a schematic, it can do it.

After removing the weapon, I placed the other Torgue weapon down, plus the S&S support machine gun, and placed a Shock Grenade mod upon the grinder. When it finished, I had an S&S machine gun, but with a shock effect. I couldn’t help but cackle as I scanned it, and got more of the same “data” for it that I got for the sniper rifle. In this case, it used the Torgue Elemental system with the Shock Mod and placed them into the S&S weapon since it was “superior” overall compared to the Torgue machinegun.

I had to stop myself from continuing to play “Gacha” with guns, and turned to Clappy. After a few moments, I removed the Dahl sniper rifle and held it to him.

“Gotchu a gun. Try to learn to use it.”

Clappy gasp before taking it like a child with a new toy and gave it a look over while aiming it at various things.

“This. Is. So. Awesome. I’m gonna shoot so many Rakks with this weaaAIT A MINUTE!”

Clappy suddenly placed the rifle into his storage and turned to me, hands on his hips. “Don’t try to distract me with the guns and gift! We have to talk about what the hell happened with you Mister! First! You wandered off without saying a word to anyone. Two, apparently you went off and took on a whole gang of bandits on your own, and actually won, but got your can kicked in the process! And “C”, Nearly got offlined to the great recycle bin in the sky…for what appears to be “no reason”!”

Clappy then dramatically took a deep breath, and I felt myself tense up when his eye actually turned slightly red in the pupil, and saw various signals from his CPU spinning up for a moment. I had gotten used to being the only one using “Hyper Analysis”. To see another claptrap do it, even for a moment, was enough to remind me I was not unique. I might need to tread carefully here.

“And to top it off, you didn’t take ME with you.” he said in an uncharacteristically calm tone.

I just stared at him, and kept staring before he finally broke.

“Why’d you do it man!?” Clappy whined.

“What makes you think I did anything?” I asked not-so innocently.

“The Vault Hunters went after you once we realized you weren’t around. They told me about the whole “went through the base like a one-bot army” you did, which, while not confirmed, was collaborated a bit by Maverick.”

Ah. So that answers that then. I felt my stomach drop…but at the same time…relief? I guess? I’m torn as hell about this. I just hope Angel, because let’s be honest she has to know about me at this point, decides to nottell her dad about me. At this point I activated my Hyper-Time, and thought for a few minutes.

Given I am now revealed, though who else knows, I have no idea, the cat is more or less out of the bag. What the consequences of this will be…I cannot foresee, and I am terrified at the unknowns of an uncertain future, because the old future is now changed. That might be a good thing, or I made things worse.

The best and smartest thing to do is just deal with problems as they come, plan for the ones you know about, and then work and hope for the best version of that end. Doesn’t make me any less anxious. Thank god I don’t have a heart to worry about anymore.

I thought for a few more minutes about how to actually answer Clappy’s question, before deciding to go against the grain this once, and just be honest. I had no idea what he was gonna do about it…but I will take the consequences as they come.

I came back down to real time, saw that less than a minute of real time passed by, and shrugged at him.

“I got mad.”

My casual way of saying what I said, and what I just said in itself, was causing Clappy’s mind to freeze for a moment, and do a minor reboot.

“I’m sorry. Wat?”

“I got mad, and decided to deal with it.” I repeated.

Clappy blinked for a moment, repeating what I had said over and over as if I just said “I’m a lollipop.”

“You just…wrecked a whole group of bandits…humans I might remind you…which in itself is just…not something we Claptraps should be able to do…because you got mad.” He finished in disbelief.

“Yep.”

“…I don’t know whether to be impressed, or terrified. You do realize that you just admitted to violating the Laws we have in our core programming. There are so many warnings going through my processor right now…The Laws say that we cannot harm any humans at all, for any reason. So…you better explain yourself buddy. I’m only just barely keeping myself from calling this in right now.”

I nodded, and was glad that this path was the one he was choosing. It was one of five I thought he’d take, and I was about to gamble now. Either this works, and I’m…kinda-sorta free and clear, or he will try and take me down here and now...somehow.

I fought my instincts to lie again in a dozen ways. “I saw someone going in and took advantage of it”, or I could have pulled the “I don’t remember much, it was like I was a passenger in my own body”, or just straight up said “Nothing happened. I fell.” Well…maybe not that last one. The Vault Hunters were there to see the aftermath.

Fortunately, I kinda…sorta…had a way around those core program laws he referred to, but it would never hold up in a court without a megacorp backing up my actions, which technically…I was…and I was about to twist that shit around.

So, in the end, I’m still lying, but leading with the truth. God, I’ve become a terrible person. I never lied like this in my old life, and while I don’t feel guilty about the previous lies, this one actually is hurting to do, and it’s because I’m telling the truth but wrapping it in a lie.

I guess it’s true. You never know what you will do until you are in the shit. I’m not a praying man, but God forgive me for what I am doing…nope. I gotta do better than that in his eyes. Fuck.

I force my focus on Clappy before I go too deep there in that blackhole, and began my bullshit...well…it…Hmm…it’s bullshit in the eyes of the law, but really…it’s still lying, but less so with the way I’m about to go. This will depend entirely on the Claptrap AI being able to make leaps of logic…and I am so nervous right now.

“Let me ask a simple question before I answer that. Would you consider bandits human…or animals?”

“What?... Human obviously. Despite their actions, they are human. Criminals who need to be put to jail, or an asylum or the insane.” Clappy answered in confusion.

“What about humans who consume other humans?”

“Cannibalism is a crime…a horrible, evil, disgusting one, but a crime nonetheless. That doesn’t make one not human, just inhumane and barbaric.” Clappy replied, and I had the feeling he was mostly reading from a preprogrammed response rather than his own opinion

Alright, not the best bed to make, but it’s a start. Now I have to use the laws against themselves in a way only a human can.

“Right. As such, we are governed by core laws that prevent us from actively doing anything to anyone who would be considered a bandit, a criminal, and so on because they’re human. Were we law enforcement units, or combat units, the laws would change, as would our purpose, but we are not.”

I crossed my arms and now played a part of my hand.

“So, if you would indulge me a bit more, explain to me the application of the Tenth Core Law.”

Clappy thought about it before answering.

“The Tenth Core Law is a revision of the Godman’s Law, which is itself a modification of a bunch of other guys who made it from the ancient Zeroth Law. ‘A robot may not harm humanity, or, by inaction, allow humanity to come to harm’. It’s since then been modified a crap-ton of times because the definition of “Humanity” has changed so much.”

“Which is what now?” I asked.

“Uhh…What is Humanity defined as? Or what is the law as it is right now?”

“Both.”

“Well, since the discovery of the Eridians, Humanity is defined as the collective of all beings who is directly descended from the planet Earth, and through the evolution of Homosapien, and calls itself human while in possession of these things…more or less. It’s stupidly more complicated than that, but that’s basically it.”

Clappy then uses a ‘thinking’ pose as he continues.

“As for the law, it’s defined as ‘A robot may not harm a human being, unless the harm done to a human is to the benefit of humanity as a whole, while still following the previous laws’. It’s really hard to actually do that one because the previous laws make it super hard to justify it when there are so many other options to choose from!” Clappy finished, waving his arms in an excited manner, emoting his defense of the laws to me wirelessly in my HUD.

I nodded my eye.

“Right. Which is all you need to know isn’t it?”

Clappy froze for a moment in confusion. “Huh? What do you mean by that? You need to…”

I would have smiled as my plan worked. Claptrap AI is capable of making leaps of logic, and as such he would come to the conclusion himself, though the question is, would he-

“You managed to justify it! WOW!...HOW!?” he shouted amazed…and then incredulously.

Crap, he did ask me. Now I had to really bullshit.

I placed my hand over my eye, as if covering my face.

“Well…to put it simply, the giant freak of a mutant was eating the leg of the boy. On a moral, ethical, and societal level, that’s already beyond the pale. Plus, the bodies in that basement. I was already stretching the limit of doing something, or nothing about it brother.”

I dramatically revealed my eye, now a red as I purposefully changed the color.

“Until you remember these bandits are insane as a result of mutations, and that most of their “rights” were removed as a result of their actions that made them criminals in the first place. Let’s be honest Clappy, just as we have a million options to choose from before the final one of death, these guys could have gone anywhere else in the universe but Pandora. You have to be really F@(%ed up to be sent here in the first place.”

I knew I was throwing the bandits under the bus since not all of them were actually bad…but most were, and the ones who weren’t likely had done some evil shit at this point unless they just ran and somehow managed it. Power to those ones as far as I’m concerned. The rest, sorry.

“To put it simply Clappy…they didn’t act in a way a human being should, but as something inhuman. Biologically is all these people have in that regard, and even then, just barely. In the end, I had to ask “will the world be better without them in it? Would humanity benefit with them gone? Would they be able to murder families and eat children again if they were no longer around?”

My eye shined brighter and darker in genuine anger as I finished those words.

Clappy, to my surprise, answered.

“Nope…and strangely…while every program in me is saying not to…I can actually agree with this. I would have to see your program memory logs to know for sure, but while I personally cannot justify this action myself at this moment…you were there when the justification of the laws happened, so I guess you can due to this fact. At least that’s what my gut is telling me. Strange… I don’t have a gut.”

“Those are your robot instincts. Learn to listen to them more often.” I quickly stated.

“Huh. Cool! So…I am so confused on how to handle this…but for now…I can’t really say this is something to report. Just…” he then, surprisingly, placed his hands on my ‘shoulders’.

“Don’t freak out like that again without tell anyone. You freaked everyone out!”

Heh…mostly you. You’re a good boy Clappy.

“Right then…on that note. Where’s Maverick. He’s got my stuff.”