Chapter 46 - Xianxian, if you’d been born a little earlier…

The night was as cool and clear as water. In the quiet little mountain village, there wasn’t much in the way of entertainment. Once night fell, apart from the occasional barking of dogs, everything was enveloped in silence.

After dinner with her grandmother and younger sister, Xia Zhijin sat with her grandmother to watch a bit of television and chat. Once she’d seen her take her medicine and drift off to sleep, she stepped outside. Alone in the yard before the low-roofed house, she slumped down wearily into the wooden chair her grandmother usually occupied and tilted her head back, gazing blankly at the night sky. Her eyes were dark and deep with thought…

Echoing faintly in her ears, over and over again, were her mother’s parting words from her sickbed:
“Zhijin, you must always repay kindness. One day, you must properly repay Auntie Shi.”

But, Mother… you didn’t tell me back then—
That debts of money are easy to repay.
But debts of kindness… are not.
And emotional debts—must they be repaid in kind?

She didn’t know how long she sat like that before footsteps approached. Then, a small wooden stool was set down beside her. Her younger sister, Xia Zhiqi, sat down and turned to her with a wide grin.

Zhijin pressed her lips together and returned a faint smile, her voice light as if nothing were wrong. “Finished your homework?”

Zhiqi nodded. “Mhm, all done. I even reviewed ahead.” She paused, hesitating, then asked tentatively, “Sis, you…”

Zhijin glanced at her, puzzled. “Hm?”

Zhiqi licked her lips, then gently took her sister’s hand, a look of concern clearly written across her young face. Her voice was soft. “Sis… is something bothering you?”
Even though Zhijin had explained she was home because of a break for the school’s sports festival, Zhiqi could tell something was off. Her sister looked exhausted—her brows and eyes full of weariness. And though she’d never been one to talk much, this time, she’d barely spoken at all since coming home.

Leaning her head against Zhijin’s shoulder, her voice still carried the innocence of a young girl. “Sis, don’t work so many part-time jobs every month. You send back so much money, but Grandma and I don’t need that much. Grandma just saves most of it. You should keep it for yourself. I’ve been thinking… when I get into high school in the city, we can rent a place and bring Grandma with us to live together. I’ll take part-time jobs just like you during my free time. We can cover tuition and living expenses ourselves. And once I grow up, I’ll work hard to make lots and lots of money. I’ll help you repay everything we owe to Auntie Shi. You don’t have to carry all the pressure on your own, okay?”

Zhijin gently rubbed her forehead against her sister’s, aching with tenderness and pride. “You’re still young. You shouldn’t be thinking about things like tuition and living costs.” She paused, thinking of that check she’d tucked under the ledger she’d kept at the Shi house for years. She bit her lip and asked, “Zhiqi… would you like to move to the city with Grandma a little earlier?”

“No.” The girl answered without hesitation. Something crossed her mind then, and her voice, so unusually mature, carried surprising clarity:
“Sis, where we live doesn’t matter. We should live the life we’re capable of. I just want you to have an easier, freer life. If Mom were still here, I think that’s what she’d want too.”

Zhijin leaned her forehead against her sister’s again and closed her eyes. Her voice was muffled. “Zhiqi… thank you.” She whispered, “Give me two more years. Once I’ve repaid Auntie Shi, let’s live simply and freely, okay?”

“Okay,” the girl replied brightly.
She didn’t notice that as she spoke, a single tear quietly slid down the corner of Zhijin’s eye, disappearing into the darkness of the night.

Two days before Christmas, the salon hosted by Xiao Wanqing’s magazine had been a success—largely thanks to Wen Tong stepping in at the last minute as the guest speaker. Despite the change, the event was well-received.

Afterward, Xiao Wanqing and Wen Tong walked downstairs to retrieve their car from the parking lot. Xiao Wanqing once again expressed her gratitude for the last-minute help, but Wen Tong simply smiled and waved it off. She pulled out a small stack of business cards from her purse and waved them teasingly.
“Come on, don’t be so formal. Honestly, I should be thanking you. I’ve been thinking about switching jobs. Who knows? Maybe there’s an opportunity in one of these.”

Xiao Wanqing blinked, a bit surprised. “A job switch? Are things not going well at work lately?”
To be honest, Wen Tong’s current company, XinChao, was considered one of the top platforms in Anjiang City. The salary and benefits were all above average. The only downside was the heavy workload, long hours, and complicated office politics.

Xiao Wanqing had worked there too, right after graduating. But she couldn’t handle the constant pressure, endless social events, and suffocating interpersonal environment. Eventually, she quit and moved to her current magazine—a smaller company with lower pay and fewer opportunities, but a more relaxed pace of life.

But Wen Tong had always been different. She adapted quickly to XinChao. In fact, in many ways, she and Xiao Wanqing were opposites.
Wanqing had never been overly ambitious—she valued a stable and comfortable life more than career development or social prestige. But Wen Tong had always been goal-oriented, with clear plans and strong drive. She was willing to give up comfort for the sake of a promising career. Out of all the new graduates who joined XinChao that year, she was the only one who’d stuck it out, rising through sheer determination to her current position.

And now… she wanted to leave?

Wanqing felt a sudden, inexplicable pang of loss.

Wen Tong walked steadily in her heels, lips curving into a faint, carefree smile. “Mm. XinChao no longer offers a clear path for advancement. I think it’s time I took a step closer to my ideal life.”
She turned to glance at Wanqing, her smile gentle. “Anyway, enough about that. Do you have plans for Christmas Eve tomorrow? Want to grab dinner?”

“Sort of what you said, compensating you for the night?” Wanqing quipped, pulling her thoughts back into the moment.

“Not at all,” Wen Tong shot her a look of mock offense. “Can’t I invite you to dinner just because I feel like it? Do I needan excuse to see you? What are you now—Ms. Super Busy?”

Wanqing thought of Lin Xian and couldn’t help but smile. Her eyes softened. “Actually, I really do have plans tomorrow. Rain check?”

Wen Tong’s expression shifted slightly, her gaze sharpening. “With who?”

“Xianxian,” Wanqing replied casually.

“Oh. Xianxian.” Wen Tong visibly relaxed. She smoothed her expression and smiled brightly. “Well then, I won’t fight a little kid over their aunt. I’ll book you for another time—how about New Year’s Eve? Let’s go soak in the hot springs at Wanquan Villa on the outskirts. I heard they’ll have a fireworks show too.”
She clearly anticipated Wanqing’s refusal and added firmly, “It’s your compensation!”

The words “I’ll pass” were on the tip of Wanqing’s tongue, but they never made it out. After a brief pause, she furrowed her brow and gave a resigned sigh. “Alright.”

Wen Tong’s eyes softened with satisfaction at those words. She couldn’t resist reaching out and gently poking Xiao Wanqing’s cheek, grinning mischievously. “That reluctant-yet-helpless look of yours—I haven’t seen it in so long. I kind of missed it.”

Xiao Wanqing shot her a helpless sidelong glance, let out a light snort, then turned and walked straight ahead without looking back. “If there’s nothing else, I’m heading home. Xianxian’s still waiting for me.”

Wen Tong stood there, watching her leave without the slightest hesitation. Her deep, dark eyes shimmered with lingering affection… and a quiet sadness. After a long moment, she slowly followed, muttering with indulgent amusement, “Always like this—use the donkey to grind the mill, then slaughter it.”

On the drive home, Xiao Wanqing couldn’t help but think about what Wen Tong had said earlier—about wanting to leave Xinchao.

So now, even the last person holding out was ready to go?

She stared out the car window at the bustling city traffic, her lips curling into a bitter smile tinged with a sense of loss.

Back then, the three of them had joined Xinchao on the recommendation of their mentor. The night before their first day, they’d gathered in Wen Tong’s bare-bones rental, drinking and laughing, painting grand visions of the future.

Wen Tong had said her life goal was to conquer the working world, build connections and experience, and eventually run her own magazine. She’d joked that her family had been farmers for generations—it was up to her to break the cycle.

Yan Jia had said her dream was to make lots of money, enough that the three of them could live freely and pursue their own paths without interference. Then, when they retired, she and Xiao Wanqing would travel the world together, experiencing all its wonders.

Xiao Wanqing had laughed and said her dream was the same as Yan Jia’s.

Yan Jia had kissed her cheek joyfully, while Wen Tong had scoffed in mock disdain, grumbling like a resentful single dog, “Let’s see who gets there first—in fifteen years!”

And just like that, so many years had flown by...

Yet fifteen years hadn’t even passed, and already it was just Wen Tong—still the same as ever, still holding on to her original dream.

As for Xiao Wanqing—what was her beginning, and what would be her end?

Heh…

When she returned home, the apartment wasn’t shrouded in the familiar darkness she’d grown used to. A dim yellow light filtered softly from within, layering the space with gentle warmth.

Lin Xian had left the light on for her.

Xiao Wanqing felt a wave of warmth spread through her chest. She sat down to change her shoes, and had just taken a few steps inside when Lin Xian came pattering out in slippers and pajamas—short sleeves and shorts, her eyes sparkling as she greeted her cheerfully. “Auntie Xiao, you’re back! How was the salon?”

She looked like she’d just crawled out of bed, her hair tousled and adorably messy. Xiao Wanqing looked at her, her gaze softening. Relaxing her shoulders, she swiftly took off her jacket and draped it over Lin Xian’s slender shoulders, gently adjusting it while gently chiding, “Coming out here without a coat again.”

Though the words were scolding, her tone was filled with nothing but tenderness and affection.

Lin Xian looked up at Xiao Wanqing’s smiling eyes, feeling the warmth of her body still lingering in the coat. That warmth seeped slowly into her own skin… and into her heart.

Their eyes met. Xiao Wanqing seemed momentarily enchanted by Lin Xian’s dewy, wide eyes, and couldn’t resist softly tapping the tip of her nose. Then she turned away, grabbed a glass from the counter, and walked over to the water dispenser, filling it as she answered, “The salon went really well. Your Aunt Wen was a huge help.”

She finished filling the glass, and as she walked back, she casually undid the second button of her blouse. Her elegant neck and a hint of pale, curving fullness peeked into view…

Lin Xian sat on the back of the sofa, watching Xiao Wanqing’s graceful figure move about the room. Her gaze lingered. She bit her lip and pulled the coat tighter around herself, the scent of Xiao Wanqing’s perfume and warmth wrapping around her like an embrace. Her throat tightened, and she swallowed instinctively.

Xiao Wanqing didn’t notice. She held the glass in one hand and leaned against the counter with her elbow resting casually, sipping water thoughtfully.

After a long pause, she suddenly looked up and asked softly, “Xianxian, have you ever thought about what your ideal life looks like?”

Lin Xian was still entranced by the rare mix of elegance and allure radiating from Xiao Wanqing. Her heart was racing, and the question caught her off guard. She blinked, straightened up, and took a breath before answering, “I’m not sure if I’ve really thought it through. I mean… I chose finance as my major, but it’s not something I’m particularly passionate about. My parents thought it had good prospects, and I just went along with their advice.” She paused, tilting her head. “I guess the life I imagine is… working hard before forty, saving enough to let my parents live comfortably. After that, I’d retire early, move to a quiet little town, live simply and peacefully—walk the dog, take strolls, and write little stories I want to tell. Just enjoy the rest of my life like that.”

She hadn’t told anyone else about this dream again. She’d mentioned it once to Zhou Qin, who had laughed and said she was too young and idealistic—once you hit forty, you’d have a family and responsibilities. Where would you find time to retire to some quiet corner of the world?

Yan Yuhuan had laughed too—everyone wants that, she said, but who really retires at forty?

But Lin Xian knew… Xiao Wanqing would never laugh at her.

There are some people in this world who know the way of the world and yet you stand your ground. That was the phrase she’d come up with after thinking about Xiao Wanqing for a long time.

She always felt that Auntie Xiao had a trace of that same pure idealism—the kind that made you believe dreams could still be real.

She bit her lip gently, eyes glowing with anticipation. “What about you, Auntie Xiao? What’s your ideal life?”

Xiao Wanqing looked at her, and in her gaze shimmered a soft light—like the glimmer of waves beneath moonlight—carrying emotions Lin Xian couldn’t quite name. After a long pause, she murmured, “It’s the same as yours…”

The truth was, Yan Jia’s dream had never really been her own. It was only because Yan Jia loved excitement that she’d been willing to walk that path alongside her, to make her dream hers.

But that wasn’t her ideal life.

She set down the glass and walked over to Lin Xian, gently running her fingers through her soft, fluffy black hair. Her voice was a gentle murmur. “Xianxian, if you’d been born a little earlier… maybe, after retirement, we could’ve been neighbors.”

Her tone was half-joy, half-regret.

Lin Xian pouted and mumbled, “I can still be now.”

Xiao Wanqing only smiled faintly… and said nothing.