Grrl Power #1327 - Booty duty peeper creeper
Added 2025-02-03 11:00:12 +0000 UTCThank you for the support! You guys are awesome!
You can tell an alien likes you when she installs advanced space encryption on your phone for the purpose of secure sexting. Even if she thinks of you as a himbo nitwit. Of course, her general opinion is that humans and most other races are lame, so her thinking of you as a nitwit is less a targeted insult, and more of a general racial narcissism. Which is just racism, really. It's not like there are a lot of racists that think some race other than their own is the superior one. >cough<
I honestly couldn't remember if I'd already shown that Sydney's space glasses had a zoom function, but there's no way that wouldn't be a function of super advanced space glasses. I only question if I've shown it before because I vaguely remember linking this video before, showing a modern smartphone zooming way out from a windmill from a plane. I think it's a Galaxy S22 maybe? That's not important. What's important is that the phone has a 10x optical zoom, and a 10x digital zoom on top of that which makes for 100x overall. The digital zoom is heavily cleaned up by some sort of algorithm, preventing it from turning into a pixely mess. My point is that space optics and space algorithms would be like 100 times better, probably.
Comments
Hey, don't knock the therapeutic value of nitwits.
Tim
2025-02-06 17:44:23 +0000 UTCPossibly, I'm talking about the smart way of handling the problem, not the paranoid psychotic way, which is more likely in this case.
Eric Loken
2025-02-04 19:53:04 +0000 UTCYup, that is exactly it.
Eric Loken
2025-02-04 19:51:32 +0000 UTCThis demonstrates a classic security issue we like to taunt vendors with when they try to sell our something guaranteed to prevent our documents from being shared or printed without permission. We ask “oh, so it keeps them from taking a picture of their screen with their phone:”. After hemming and hawing they suggest if that’s an issue ban cellphones at work. So we complain that then we need a guard to search everyone for their phone in case they think that rule is stupid, but surely it prevents them from calling someone on their desk phone and reading the document out loud? Typing a summary into another window and printing that? Writing the document down by hand in a notebook? Holding it up to a window for an accomplice to take super zoom photos from next door? No? None of that. Is that in the next version?
Ron Jarrell
2025-02-04 19:20:02 +0000 UTCSydney and Kender; both know the whole world loves them. Even that dragon chasing them through the dungeon is just a little upset about the shiney that fell into their pocket.
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:25:48 +0000 UTCFolded optics on an atomic scale give her glasses the resolution of the Webb telescope. (Always dream big)
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:21:53 +0000 UTCThis is Sciona. She will attempt to strangle Sydney and hide the body.
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:19:38 +0000 UTCAt least the drool on his screen isn't visible.
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:17:14 +0000 UTCShe already knows Sydney. but she forgot how irritating she could be.
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:15:42 +0000 UTCForgetting one of her new powers. That is so Sydney. And her approach to Sciona even more so. Tail wagging and thought processes are "oh fun! new friend!"
eddi_TBH
2025-02-04 04:14:37 +0000 UTCI thought her greatest weakness was mittens & duct tape.
Person
2025-02-04 03:24:50 +0000 UTCYeah, they're pretty cheap, really
Merle Blue
2025-02-04 01:24:18 +0000 UTCYes but they cost as much as I spent on my phone.
Opus the Poet
2025-02-03 22:08:55 +0000 UTCLove the vein pulsing on her forehead.
Hugh Eckert
2025-02-03 19:51:26 +0000 UTCOr maybe they aren't actually lenses but are actually screens and there are hundreds or thousands of tiny cameras on the front side and they have some collective means of compensating for the limitations of their individual size.
Jacob Bissey
2025-02-03 19:13:21 +0000 UTCAgreed, only force me to change my password when there's actually reason to suspect there may have been a breach, and definitely not periodically as then you have a predictable schedule for when people won't know their passwords off the top of their heads and thus will open more vulnerabilities. Instead of requiring strings of random characters or whatever, require passphrases, they are more secure and easier to remember. A good passphrase won't need to be written down to be recalled when you need it, will be harder to guess than a simple password even if it's something personal, and the significantly higher character count makes it harder to brute force
Jacob Bissey
2025-02-03 19:09:40 +0000 UTCSour cream and onion chips are gonna blow her mind.
ThatOneComicGuy
2025-02-03 18:56:00 +0000 UTCSydney merely asked if she was a super, so that can be played down, particularly if she goes with saying her powers are minor. If she can convince Sydney that it's no big deal, Sydney may even neglect to mention it to anyone simply because she doesn't think it's important.
Eric Loken
2025-02-03 18:07:56 +0000 UTCShe just believes that she's simply engaging in conversation and not in fact confronting a super villain. It's a minor trope - most often used for comedy - stumbling onto the villain's secret without realizing you have,
Eric Loken
2025-02-03 18:02:56 +0000 UTCDo they make polarized privacy screens for smartphones?
JonPR
2025-02-03 17:33:54 +0000 UTCSydney thinks of herself as the backup! Her hubris is her greatest weakness.
Torabi
2025-02-03 17:18:35 +0000 UTCLol, *your
Person
2025-02-03 16:48:05 +0000 UTCThe limits of optics are different for different materials. You can get around a lot of the packaging and size limits if you use mirrors instead of glass or some other transparent material. Maybe Space™ glasses have found a way to dynamically reflect light inside the "lens" (for lack of a better word) to adjust zoom and focus.
Killianti
2025-02-03 16:47:44 +0000 UTCSydney forgot the rookie rule, Always Call For Backup Before Engaging!
Richard Riley
2025-02-03 16:18:36 +0000 UTCThe idiot part is making the password requirements (including how often you need to change them) so onerous that we NEED to write them down. :P
Richard Riley
2025-02-03 16:16:32 +0000 UTCOr poriting the office WiFi password with huge, BOLD LETTERS and putting somewhere WHERE IT VISIBLE FROM THE STREET... I am still mad about that.
Sir Butcher
2025-02-03 15:10:52 +0000 UTCThis illustrates that no matter how secure the system, there will always be a weak link: the user. It's why most of the job in cyber security is lecturing people about not doing the obvious idiotic stuff like writing down passwords on post its or opening pishing emails.
Playwars
2025-02-03 14:58:15 +0000 UTCShe does have odd reactions to threats. If she knows you're threatening her, yes she can feel fear, but there's been times when she's just oblivious to it. Perhaps kender are just oblivious to it all the time? From what I remember they have authorial immunity.
Mark Magagna
2025-02-03 14:47:13 +0000 UTChidden villain caught sexting... whoda thunk? Now the question is, how is she going to play this off and NOT get on ARCHON's "radar"...
William Elliott
2025-02-03 14:44:20 +0000 UTCCould Sydney have just opened up an HR nightmare, which will be overlooked and covered up (this time) since she revealed some crucial information?
Town Crier
2025-02-03 13:52:18 +0000 UTC"No no work life balance, girl." SCIONA YES. FUCKIN GET IT. I have never liked her more than this moment
Brittany Huckey
2025-02-03 13:50:30 +0000 UTCShe forgot rule no. 1 about secure communications. MAKE SURE YOUR IMMEDIATE AREA IS SECURE!
Thisguy
2025-02-03 13:36:37 +0000 UTCYour phone is getting hot when you text because your sub-standard grammar is making the auto-correct work overtime and it's embarrassed to be used by someone with such poor language skills. The boob-storage is what's making it happy enough to put up with you.
Anton Schleef
2025-02-03 13:32:25 +0000 UTCDespite her lack of hairy legs she always seemed part Kender to me. Fun-sized, full of energy, seems more than a bit looney, don't blink or you'll lose track of her. Really, the only thing she's missing is the near total immunity to fear and I'd be convinced she's a Kender under a permanent polymorph spell.
Anton Schleef
2025-02-03 13:25:52 +0000 UTCThe size of the lens and the distance puts a physical limit on the resolution of objects, if I remember my optical physics. I would be surprised if iphone text is not below that limit at that distance. But some predictive text could probably recover most of the detail (with some hilarious typos).
Greg Morrow
2025-02-03 13:19:34 +0000 UTCShe has REALLY mastered that comedy lean-in, hasn't she.
Andrew Denton
2025-02-03 13:03:29 +0000 UTCAlso, no one should be tempting fate like that, so Syd can't even be blamed
You_With_The_Face
2025-02-03 12:40:11 +0000 UTCNever change, Sydney. Never change.
You_With_The_Face
2025-02-03 12:37:03 +0000 UTCSo now we know Sydney absolutely has a super power for twarting villains accidentally
Aclys
2025-02-03 12:00:58 +0000 UTCEasiest way to hack a secure communication, really: have someone on hand at the receiving (or sending, I suppose) end who can just read the decrypted version.
Madcat6204
2025-02-03 11:23:48 +0000 UTCAnother thwarting made possible by ADHD nosiness
Michael Obert
2025-02-03 11:22:09 +0000 UTCThe technology is uncrackable end-to-end communication. Unfortunately, at either of those ends, it has zero protection from ADHD squirrels suffering from boredom...
James C
2025-02-03 11:06:38 +0000 UTC
