Update Regarding Billing & Content

Howdy folks,

Sorry if I'm causing confusion by having yet another update on the situation with the upcoming re-launch, but the relentless torrent of new to-dos and incessant presentation of surprise hurdles has hobbled me. My efficiency is kneecapped and my proficiency is funny-boned.

And to make matters worse: Poor me, I'm going to Turks and Caicos. My sincerest apologies to anyone who may be affected, but I hope that my audience will accept that I have done everything in my power to prevent this, and I hope to one day regain the public's trust. My family's going, and they're not going without me. Here's the deal.

Because of this, and the bottomless bog of chunky black gumbo that is the thickness (can I get a witness?) of my minutiae, I will not be present to press the "pause" button again at midnight on the 31st like Jack Conte demands I must, and I will not be able to make time to bring you all of your curdled gruel and slop cOnTeNt while rebuilding the Patreon by April.

Instead, in April I will be offering an unexpected smorgasbord of odds-meets-ends scraps and clips from the fairly improvisational editing process of the upcoming concert film/stand-up special, as well as a couple of phone-on-the-bench demos of music for the upcoming video game. It will all go out to Tier 3 and up. Tier 2, (Tier 1 is capped) I'm sorry, I got nothing for you this month. Feel free to pay me more, though. Eh? Could be fun! Could be fun.

Hopefully you'll get the new Patreon build and you'll be returned to your regularly scheduled programming at the end of April. Pricing will be different. Current members won't have their rates increased, but they will have to change tiers to get the new stuff in some cases. The good news is, the videos I'll be posting this time around will often be longer-form, include more songs per video and larger chunks of shows, and yada yada. I'm excited for that, because I'm actually kind of proud of this upcoming round of Patreon videos, whereas last time I was just dragging myself to the finish line of hiatus while throbbing entrails spilled out the viral wound in my lower gut and smeared itself into the track behind me like lipstick against concrete. Screaming. Begging for release. You all cried "stay with me!" and impotently slapped my face as I teetered over the lip of oblivion while my features grew limp and pallid and my body ran cold and bereft of spirit. And I was like "nah" and dipped. Content warning, gore. Did I do it right? Is that joke just so 2020?

Where was I?

Right. At the end of the post. Okay, there's your update. Re-read it if you have any questions. If your questions aren't answered on the re-read, it's because I don't have an answer yet. Stay tuned, idiot. Sorry, I don't mean that. Unless you're an idiot, in which case I hope it feels good to be acknowledged directly. You're welcome. Representation matters. Is that joke just so 2021?

Much love and slash-J or whatever,
-ww